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- Path: sparky!uunet!spool.mu.edu!torn!news.ccs.queensu.ca!qucdn!saundrsg
- Organization: Queen's University at Kingston
- Date: Fri, 1 Jan 1993 01:02:48 EST
- From: Graydon <SAUNDRSG@QUCDN.QueensU.CA>
- Message-ID: <93001.010248SAUNDRSG@QUCDN.QueensU.CA>
- Newsgroups: soc.bi
- Subject: Re: Purity
- References: <1993Jan1.014238.17022@netcom.com>
- Lines: 38
-
- In article <1993Jan1.014238.17022@netcom.com>, boserj@netcom.com (Jeffrey Boser)
- says:
- >
- >A few days ago, driving roy to the campus (Hi roy! I want another hug!)
- >we got into a conversation about bi and how it is resented by 'purists'.
- >Lesbians who think that a woman who sleeps with a man is sleeping with
- >the 'enemy'. At the time I got tiffed at being considered an enemy,
- >but I have been thinking about this alot the past few days.
- >
- >At every attempt to label sexuality, there are exceptions. There are
- >lesbians who are married to men, there are bi's that are sexual exclusively
- >with one gender, there are even people who get off without even touching
- >themselves or another, as well as people who never get off.
- >
- >What I am wondering is why there is such a strong demand for purity in
- >our lebels? And if we will ever be accepting of exceptions when they
- >initially come up, or do we have to continue to bash out some elbow room
- >if we want be a little deviant?
- >
- [the rest of Jeff's post sent elsewhere]
-
- Words are the hands of the mind.
-
- To expand upon that a little, if you don't have a word for it, things
- can be hard to think about. Or, worse, if the conotations that a word
- you are given don't fit you. I certainly don't feel suffused with the
- standard social consensus spirit of manliness, for instance, even if
- I am one. (Once, during an intimate moment, someone told me I was 'such
- a man'. It was meant as a compliment; I still can't hear it except as
- very sarcastic, at best, because I know damn well I'm not.)
-
- Sexuality (which is very personal) is presently very tied up with
- issues of social conformity and group identity axioms. If labels
- can be created that refer to sexual preferences but *don't*
- connect to those axioms, the problem in large measure goes away.
- (Theoretically; so far as I know, this has never happened.)
-
- Graydon
-