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- From rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan Sun Jul 2 14:50:10 1995
- Path: cc.gatech.edu!erica
- From: erica@cc.gatech.edu ()
- Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan
- Subject: ANNOUNCING THE RESULTS OF THE BELA CONTEST
- Date: 1 Jul 1995 00:29:31 -0400
- Organization: College of Computing, Georgia Tech
- Lines: 856
- Message-ID: <3t2ivb$rhg@cleon.cc.gatech.edu>
- NNTP-Posting-Host: cleon.cc.gatech.edu
- NNTP-Posting-User: erica
-
- **********************************************************************
-
- The Trustees of the Jordan FAQ Dowager Association Proudly Present
-
- THE TABULATED RESULTS OF
- THE ANTEPENULTIMATE BELA CONTEST
-
- **********************************************************************
-
- Thank you everyone for a delightful contest, lots of votes and
- a fun time had by all! Congratulations to all our winners.
-
- -------------------------------------
- AND INTRODUCING....THE GUILTY PARTIES
- -------------------------------------
-
- THE CAST PARTY (Bela Instinct, Entry 1)
- ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE *
- * Most Humorous Entry *
- ************************
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Novel Entry *
- *********[TIE]**********
- ************************
- * THIRD PRIZE *
- * Sir Empiess Memorial *
- ************************
- Author: Jared Lord Feehan (jdfeehan@merle.acns.nwu.edu)
-
- THE LIMERICK (Entry 2)
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Sir Empiess Memorial *
- ************************
- Author: HRM Karl Johann, Fungi Rex (k-j-nore@dsv.su.se)
-
- MIASMA NIGHT (Entry 3)
- ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE *
- * Most Novel Entry *
- ************************
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Exciting Entry *
- ************************
- Author: Baron Michael Sabia (sabia@romulus.rutgers.edu)
-
- TEL'TEL'TEL'ARAN-RHIOD (Entry 4)
- ************************
- * THIRD PRIZE *
- * Most Humorous Entry *
- ************************
- Author: Erica Sedai (erica@cc.gatech.edu)
-
- THE RIDDLE (Entry 5)
- ************************
- * HONORABLE MENTION *
- ************************
- Author: Sir Hawkbite (garrett@cs.unc.edu)
-
- THE STORY NOT WRITTEN (Entry 6)
- ************************
- * HONORABLE MENTION *
- ************************
- Author: Goodman Brad Johnson (bgjohnso@news.amherst.edu)
-
- RACEHORSE (Entry 7)
- ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE *
- * Sir Empiess Memorial *
- ************************
- ************************
- * THIRD PRIZE *
- * Most Exciting Entry *
- ************************
- Author: The (Late) Michael Sir Empiess (ghesmiz@strauss.udel.edu)
-
- NEIGH'BLIS (Entry 8)
- ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE *
- * Most Exciting Entry *
- ************************
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Novel Entry *
- *********[TIE]**********
- Author: Erica Sedai (erica@cc.gatech.edu)
-
- POINT/COUNTERPOINT (Entry 9)
- ************************
- * HONORABLE MENTION *
- ************************
- Authors: Sir Hawkbite and Det. Hohn Darlow
- (garrett@cs.unc.edu, donh@netcom.com)
-
- FRED AND VIRGIL (Entry 10)
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Humorous Entry *
- ************************
- Author: Mark the Loy (mloy@indyvax.iupui.edu)
-
-
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------
- THE ENTRIES
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------
- ***********
- * ENTRY 1 *
- ***********
- Author: Jared Lord Feehan (jdfeehan@merle.acns.nwu.edu)
-
- ************************ ************************ ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE * * SECOND PRIZE * * THIRD PRIZE *
- * Most Humorous Entry * * Most Novel Entry * * Sir Empiess Memorial *
- ************************ *********[TIE]********** ************************
-
- Bela Instinct
-
- Bela was bored. "What do I do now? I've just read the script for the next
- book, _Lord of Chaos_, and I have the smallest of roles--and it's not even
- me, just a 'dream Bela.' What a farce! Everyone knows that _I'm_ the Lord
- of Chaos. Hmpf."
-
- Suddenly: "BELA, DO NOT DISPAIR. YOU WILL BE A MAJOR CHARACTER IN THE
- NEXT BOOK."
-
- "Oh, yeah? And why should I believe you? Wait--who are you anyway?"
-
- "IT IS I, THE CREATOR OF ALL THINGS EQUINE."
-
- "Figures. Rand gets to speak to the Creator, and I just get to speak to
- the Horse Creator. Why's that? I'm sick of being underused. You hear
- that Robert Jordan, wherever you are? If I don't get a bigger part in the
- next book, I'm going to quit the series and join _Melrose Place_. They'll
- love me there."
-
- "AHEM. I WAS TALKING, BELA."
-
- "Yeah, well, so what? Like I've never talked to a Deity before. Right."
-
- "NO, YOU HAVEN'T."
-
- "Oh yes I have. I didn't say a good Deity, y'know. The Great Lord of the
- Dark doesn't like to be looked down on. It's really sad: he's always
- sitting around Shayol Ghul crying his eyes out, saying how noone loves him
- and how he has to keep on resurrecting his friends from the dead and how
- he's really tired and how he'd rather have just been a poet, but no, his
- father made him become the Dark One. Really sad."
-
- "AHEM. I WAS TALKING, BELA. AS I WAS SAYING, YOU WILL BE A MAJOR
- CHARACTER IN THE NEXT BOOK."
-
- "Yeah, well so what! I'm sick of waiting around for a year, and this time
- a year and a half, just for a small little role. Y'know I was offered the
- lead in 'Nell' but no, RJ wouldn't let me out of my contract. So I'm stuck
- neighing about and carrying females around on my back. What a job!"
-
- "FINE. I'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING MORE TO DO IN _LORD OF CHAOS_. BUT MIND
- YOU, IT'S NOT GOING TO BE IN THE ACTUAL BOOK."
-
- "Yeah, so what! As long as I get to do something. I haven't even had a
- romance yet! And why have I yet to be mentioned in a prophesy. It's part
- of my contract: page two, paragraph three: 'Bela will be alluded to in at
- least one prophesy and have a pivotal role in the conclusion of the
- series.' It's right there. And it better not be stupid: I don't want to
- lose a hoof over this."
-
- "YOU CAN QUIT WHINING, IT'S NOT VERY BECOMING IN A HORSE."
-
- "Horses whinny, they don't whine. And how are you to know, Mr. Horse
- Creator, sir? All you do is sit around and 'create' all day. _I'm_ the
- one who has to do all the real work. And what thanks do I get? None.
- Feh."
-
- "SHUT UP, BELA."
-
- "You can't tell me to shut up, you little--"
-
- "YES I CAN. AND I'M GETTING SICK OF YOU. GET OUT OF MY FACE."
-
-
-
-
- Just then: Bela evaporated into thin air, and reappeared elsewhere.
-
- Waving her fist, er, hoof in the air, Bela said, "You won't get away with
- this, Horse Creator. You'll be hearing from my agent!"
-
- "Save your breath, kid. It won't work."
-
- Bela turned around and saw who had spoken to him: Moiraine. But it was
- not just her in the room. There was Lanfear, and Tam, and Hurin, and
- Elyas, and Galad, and Asmodean, and Cenn Biue, and Bayle Domon, and
- Egeanin, and a few others. Bela had seen them all before at the cast
- parties upon the completion of some of the books. But Lanfear and Moiraine
- hadn't bothered to show up at the last one.
-
- "Moiraine, why are you here? Hasn't Thom found you yet? And you, Lanfear?"
-
- Moiraine, who was looking very un-Aes Sedai-like in a scullery woman's
- outfit, answered, "No, Thom has not found me yet. That good for nothing,
- wool-headed brat. If it wasn't in my contract that I have to marry him,
- I'd never do it. I'm dreading the wedding night right now. And his laxity
- at trying to find me is disgusting. I'm still in that damn Tower of
- Ghen'whatever. Sheesh."
-
- "But why are you here?" Bela looked around at the room the bunch were
- sitting in. It was painted a disgusting olive green with purple
- polka-dots. The furniture was all a bright yellow stuck haphazardly around
- the room, and the one, bright red door that would lead out was covered with
- chains--alot of them.
-
- "Why am I here? That's what I've been asking myself for a long time now,
- Bela. You'd think that I, a very major character, wouldn't have gotten
- 'killed off' just because the damn script writer couldn't come up with a
- better way to get Lan off my shoulders. Well! And it was in my contract
- from day one that I'd get a chapter icon of my own. I had one, until
- Lanfear showed up. And RJ decided to 'sacrifice' my beautiful icon for the
- sake of her stupid one." Moiraine turned and sneered at Lanfear. Lanfear
- sneered back.
-
- "Where was I? Oh yeah, I had just been stuck in the Tower, and I was
- sitting around, playing cards with Lanfear (she cheats like a drunken
- sailor)--"
-
- "I do not! Just because I always win doesn't mean I cheat. And just
- because you saw me with a couple aces up my sleeve doesn't mean I would've
- used them. It's just, it's just, it's just the new fashion in Ebou
- Dar--wearing aces in your sleeves. Honest! Ask anybody!" Lanfear, in an
- all-white scullery maid outfit, and feeling like she had just come up with
- a great excuse, smiled beatifically (as beatific smilers usually do) and
- batted her eyes.
-
- Moiraine rolled her eyes at Lanfear. She leaned over to Bela's ear, "She's
- such a bad actress. She just got the part by sleeping with Jordan. Though
- I wouldn't tell his wife about that if I were you."
-
- Then to everyone: "As I was saying, I was in the Tower of Ghen'jei playing
- cards with Lanfear and drinking Zima's. You'd think those Finn creatures
- would stock wine, but no, they only had Zima's. Blech! Well, I was
- sitting there drinking when guess who should show up. Yup, the old Jordan
- guy himself. He said he was visiting us both, but I had my suspicions. I
- stood up, and in a drunken rage told RJ that he had better stick me in
- _Lord of Chaos_ or I'd tell his wife that he was empiessing the old bitch
- over there."
-
- Lanfear sneered. "I am not old!"
-
- Moiraine sneered back (Bela was beginning to wonder if that was the only
- emotion the two had) and continued: "He was not amused. He said, 'How
- dare you? You were nothing until I started writing this series. Sure you
- were on a Love Boat episode once, but who hasn't been. You wanted to be
- more than just another Charo, just another Captain Stubing. And that's why
- you came to me and begged to be Moiraine. I had always pictured Moiraine
- as a six foot six giant of a woman, but you convinced me that a short
- Moiraine would still be good. And now you dare to blackmail me!' Needless
- to say, I found myself in this room: the Den of the Underused Characters.
- And then that fat whore over there showed up when RJ moved on to the
- greener pastures of Aviendha."
-
- Lanfear sneered, "I am not fat! And Aviendha, that bitch! She's been
- trying to get a bigger role ever since she first appeared. Ooh, I hate
- her!" Lanfear sat down on a sofa, swearing to herself and twiddling her
- thumbs rapidly.
-
- Moiraine looked down, depressed (Aha! Bela thought. Another emotion!).
- "Why does _she_ have to be here?"
-
- Tam walked over and patted Bela on her back. "Bela, I've been here ever
- since the cast party of _The Shadow Rising_. I showed up with Perrin and
- Faile and Alanna and Verin and Cenn Biue. RJ just told us to wait here for
- awhile, and we agreed. They're all gone now, but Cenn. Hurin was already
- here, as was that Simion guy over there in the corner." He pointed.
-
- Simion sat staring at the corner repeating, "I will be back. He said I
- will be back. I will be back...."
-
- Bela frowned. "Poor guy. Who is he? I just met him that one time at the
- cast party of _The Dragon Reborn_. He seemed happy there."
-
- "Yeah, well he was in one scene near the beginning of that book. It seems
- that RJ offered him a big contract. He was going to be the guy who 'came
- after' Rand and got Callandor in the end. But RJ changed his mind, and
- wouldn't let the guy out of his contract. Jordan told him that he'd find
- some way to bring Simion back, though of course Jordan was lieing. So he
- sits here waiting. Sad really. But not as sad as Hurin." He pointed.
-
- Hurin sat staring straight ahead of himself. Every once in awhile he blinked.
-
- "What's wrong with him?" Bela asked.
-
- "He's been that way since I've been here. Cenn says that Hurin first
- appeared here after _The Great Hunt_ cast party. Remember that party?
- Hurin was the life of it! He was so happy and confident. Well, Cenn said
- that in the beginning Hurin was fine. He said that RJ promised that he'd
- reappear in the middle of _The Dragon Reborn_ and stay in the action until
- the end of the series. So he just decided to sit and wait. He hasn't
- moved since. Poor guy."
-
- Bela pointed at another guy in a corner. "Who's he?"
-
- "Oh, that's the no-name guy. He was the first person here way back in the
- beginning of _The Eye of the World_. He was supposed to be another main
- character, but RJ trashed him after some infighting between Perrin and him.
- Perrin hated the guy; he thought that no-name was stuck-up. So Perrin
- told RJ, 'Either he goes or I go.' RJ really had no choice seeing as how
- Perrin was the big-name actor in the beginning having just come off of a
- two-year engagement on Seseme Street, and so no-name showed up here. In
- fact, Perrin decorated the room in this ugly color scheme just to annoy
- him, and he decided that anyone who shows up in this room should look like
- a maid or a butler"--Bela looked herself over: even she was wearing a
- tightly fitted French maid's outfit--"You should've seen the sparks fly
- when Perrin showed up. It was all the rest of us could do to just keep
- the two away from each other."
-
- Bela shook her head. She looked around, then at the door, then at
- Moiraine. "Moiraine, have you ever tried to just saidarize the door? We
- could then leave. Right?"
-
- "What? Oh, why no I haven't. What a novel idea." Moiraine then glowed
- with the Power, and the chains fell off the door. She smiled.
-
- Bela looked down and thought to herself: "What a bunch of morons.
- Couldn't even come up with that! That's what you get with a lot of actors,
- I guess."
-
-
-
-
- They opened the door and looked out. It was the cast party for _Lord of Chaos_.
-
- Rand meandered over to them. "Well, how do yous all doesing?" He burped.
- "I's just fine thank you ery mush. Here have some brainy, br-br-breny,
- bran-do, brandee. Yeah, that's it, brany! No, no, breny, brenda, brandy.
- Whatever. Drink up. And you little lady"--he pointed to
- Moiraine--"where'v you been keepin' yurself. Get yur hot little butt over
- here." Then, he fell to the ground, passed out.
-
- Moiraine sniffed. "Actors." She walked away.
-
- On the dance floor, the music was playing disco and Nynaeve (dressed in a
- miniskirt, high heels, and a tank top--all hot pink) and Logain (dressed in
- a toga) were causing quite a stir.
-
- Mat was seated plaintively in a corner reading his prayer book and praying
- that no woman would touch him and that noone would spike his orange juice.
-
- Egwene sauntered over to Mat, waving her vodka bottle in his face. "How'd
- you like to come up and see me sometime, big boy?" She sat on his lap.
- Mat read his prayer book louder, "Bless me, Creator. Bless me. Bless
- me."
-
- Egwene stood up. "Good for nothing, prude. Oh, Perrin, can you handle one
- more woman in your camp?" Perrin, sitting with Faile, Alanna, Min, Siuan,
- and Leane, waved her over.
-
- Suddenly Verin was on top of a table. Holding a bottle of gin in one hand
- and a lit cigarette in the other, she started to sing Jak o' Shadows to the
- beat of the music. She soon stopped as she caught Loial's eye across the
- room. "Oh, Loial! Follow me upstairs would you? I've gotta go to bed
- now. Why don't you join me?" She blinked; he followed. (Editor's note:
- Proof that Loial is not gay.)
-
- Elayne, drinking an anonymous beer out of a plastic cup and smoking a
- cigar, was hosting a belching contest:
-
- "Okay, hairy lummoxes of men and you too Berelain. Let's hear some good
- belches."
-
- When all was said, er, belched and done, the winner was Berelain:
-
- "I'd like to thank the Academy, and my parents, and most of all The Great
- Lord of the Dark, who I couldn't have won without."
-
- A crowd had gathered around Bela. Cloud, Mandarb, Red, and Stepper were
- all fighting each other to get to dance with Bela. Bela waved her hoof
- around and said, "You first, Mandarb. But, trust me, I'll get to everybody
- in one way or another." Bela blinked at them.
-
- Insert as many gratuitous empiesses as you want.
-
- The End
-
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 2 *
- ***********
- Author: HRM Karl Johann, Fungi Rex (k-j-nore@dsv.su.se)
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Sir Empiess Memorial *
- ************************
-
- No ladies present?
-
- No priest present?
-
- You have been warned...
-
- The Bela mare from Emond's Field
- From her loss of Tam did grieve
- But she got help
- When with a "Yelp!"
- She forced Mandarb's blade to yield
-
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 3 *
- ***********
- Author: Baron Michael Sabia (sabia@romulus.rutgers.edu)
- ************************ ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE * * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Novel Entry * * Most Exciting Entry *
- ************************ ************************
-
- Bela in LoC:
-
- In the quiet night, as the stars shone bright, the chirping of
- crickets sent ripples down my skin. The need began to fill me, and
- the strain of holding myself together began to take its toll. Looking
- quickly around (and emitting a neigh to calm the smelly beasts around
- me), I turned to my liquid state, pouring myself into the feed-bag
- hung next to the stall.
-
- A half hour having passed, I reform myself. Neigh, not into my
- humble equine form, but into an equally humble, or rather an
- unnoticeable, human form. One single surge of rage ripples through me,
- goose-bumps covering my new form. Goose-bumps though, not the electric like
- current which flows down my skin, raising the delicate hairs on my
- arms and nape. Self-fullfillingly, a minor "current" flows, relieving
- the caustic feeling that caused the goose-bumps.
-
- The urge to rage still comes to me, even after so long, knowing I
- can do nothing. Ever since I learned about the bastardization of
- the power, the power that lets me go unseen, a listener to the
- universe and this world. *sigh*, the years have passed. I feel
- alone. Over 3 millenia, guarding this world, fulfilling my mission.
- Knowledge brings power, and knowledge brings pain. Sometimes I let
- myself fall into introspection, wondering if this ability, the
- knowledge has been worth it. There were sacrifices to be in mastery
- of those currents, but just thinking of those electric-like tinglings
- flow throught my body, the source of my power, helps me rise out of
- the introspection. The sacrifice, the pain, was worth it. But that
- doesn't help during the long nights, alone.
-
- Its so hard when not in a human-like form. For, when I am in another
- form, I am forced to take on the appearance of the female gender. Its
- only another balance of course, like Saidin to Saidar. To keep the
- practitioner in check. Checks and balances. Chuckle, ah, the power I
- first felt when I discovered my abilities, oh so many years ago! Yes,
- I suppose that I could easily have begun to feel pride, the pride that
- kills. Its only been because of the humiliation I always feel, that
- has kept me sane and has let me continue to honor the pact I made; and honor.
-
- Pride, the deadly sin, I would have easily succumbed to it, if not for
- the checks and balances. But I fulfill my mission, and rage DOES
- fill me at what has been done with this sacrosanct ability. My ability to go
- unseen, pass to and from without others even knowing. The shadow
- stole that ability from my brothers and sisters. The power to make
- oneself seem too "average" to notice. The Shadow stole it, using it
- to create the bastards of the power, the Gray Men.
-
- And yet, that is only the beginning of my power. Sometimes, I fret.
- Could the shadow know more than that simple trick? Could it know that
- there might be someone out there, passing like a shadow through
- civilization, counteracting his, the Dark One's, actions? Oh, I hope
- not, and yet I sleep at nights fretting. Especially now, when
- everything comes to a head.
-
- In my grey form, I leave the decrepit stable, standing dark in the
- starry night. The moon-less sky overhead sends uncalled for tingling
- through my skin. And yet, I only wait a second admiring the stars and
- infinity. Going about my nightly task, I go to Demira's house and
- listen. So hot, so hot! I know who Helina is of course. Or what she
- is rather. And yet I can't identify which one. She must be a
- forsaken, but which one? And yet I can't act. Even if I could break
- my vows and kill, she could just be sent back again, sent out after
- me, with the knowledge that I live. And work. And plot.
-
- Not to say that I haven't acted my part in this play. I distract. I can
- rarely do more than that for fear of the knowledge of my existence
- flowing back to the Dark One. And yet now, now that the Dragon has been
- reborn, I have had to take chances. I have let a select few know that
- someone is out there, working. Chuckle, how they would be surprised by
- who and what I really am! ha ha.
-
- Paying closer attention to the figures within, I try to see their
- faces. Sigh, they are turned so that I can't read their lips. Or
- rather Demira's. I'm not foolish enough to test what the other one
- can do, or see. Who knows what the forsaken can accomplish? Turning
- from the window and the house, I go forth again.
-
- And think. I fear I am going to have to give these blind fools more
- hints. To think that now, when everything hangs in balance, they
- still won't trust each other. I bet they haven't even told Rand about
- the seal. Nah, I suppose they aren't THAT foolish.
-
- Creak. Swish, bang, a pail flies past my head. Eyes wide, I swing my
- head around. A miasma! Quickly I hide. I can do little and
- the risk! And yet... quickly I hurry to the wench's house. Wench?
- Witch? Whatever, the house Nynaeve is in. To think she STILL hasn't
- broken the block! They come out wide-eyed. Hurrying inside I make
- sure that Moghedian isn't planning on doing anything foolish. Hiding
- under the bed! Oh what a great laugh!
-
- Keeping one eye on her, I look out the window to see Nynaeve joining a
- circle! Yes! Perhaps! Her fear should have no effect now. But then
- again, with her stubbornness.., sigh. She must face her fear! And
- yet telling her so will only destroy the possibility of her learning
- it herself. Being told so, she will only deny it.
-
- But behold, a foretelling. Well, this is providential! Another hint
- for them. Another piece for Rand to use to solve the puzzle. Of
- course that's assuming they tell him!
-
- When these rebels go to see Rand, I'll have my chance to put him in
- the right direction. After all, there is still some time. It isn't
- like the Dark One is trying to kill him. That's the problem with these
- so called Aes Sedai. Pride! To believe they know everything! I'll
- have to work harder. To me, the intuitive steps are so obvious. And
- yet at the moment I can do nothing. I set down to watch Mogihedien,
- and think about the other forsaken in town. What are her plans? I
- settle down and ponder.
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 4 *
- ***********
- Author: Erica Sedai (erica@cc.gatech.edu)
-
- ************************
- * THIRD PRIZE *
- * Most Humorous Entry *
- ************************
-
- Munch munch munch munched Bela. Ahhh. Another curry. Ahhh. Time
- to sleep. Snore snore. This must be Tel'Aran'Rhiod.
-
- Munch munch munch munched Bela. Ahhh. Another curry. Ahhh. Time
- to sleep. Even in Tel'Aran'Rhiod? Why not? Snore snore. This
- must be Tel'Tel'Aran'Rhiod.
-
- Munch munch munch munched Bela. Ahhh. Another curry. Ahhh. Time
- to sleep. Even in Tel'Tel'Aran'Rhiod? Why not? Snore snore.
- This must be Tel'Tel'Tel'Aran'Rhiod. Munch munch munch munched Bela.
-
- Time to wake up.
-
- Time to wake up.
-
- Oh. Hi, Egwene.
-
- Time to wake up.
-
- Munch munch munch munched Bela. Ahhh. Another curry. Ahhh. Time
- to sleep. Snore snore.
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 5 *
- ***********
- Author: Sir Hawkbite (garrett@cs.unc.edu)
-
- ************************
- * HONORABLE MENTION *
- ************************
-
- Where is Bela in tLoC?
-
- She's over there in the stable, horsing around with Mandarb.
-
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 6 *
- ***********
- Author: Goodman Brad Johnson (bgjohnso@news.amherst.edu)
-
- ************************
- * HONORABLE MENTION *
- ************************
-
- Bela is the One who is Lost.
- I wish I had the energy to write that story. Bela going to the *finn and
- conquering them. With the fire in her eye, the iron on her hooves, her
- musical neigh... (But must sleep NOW)
-
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 7 *
- ***********
- Author: The (Late) Michael Sir Empiess (ghesmiz@strauss.udel.edu)
-
- ************************ ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE * * THIRD PRIZE *
- * Sir Empiess Memorial * * Most Exciting Entry *
- ************************ ************************
-
- The Little Tower council was rehashing the same old argument. "We need
- money, and she can help us bring some in," Sheriam yelled for the
- umpteenth time, "It doesn't violate the three oaths, and she could do it
- for us."
-
- "But how am I supposed to be able to go anywhere if she's not around.
- She was my source of transportation," Siuan moaned while Sheriam snickers
- "So, I guess you'll just have to stick around here for a while."
- ***
- "You want to enter this nag in a horse race. You have got to be kidding."
-
- "I'll race her against any horse you got. What Bela lacks in muscle,
- she more than makes up in Spirit." So Racemaster puts Bela up against one
- of his faster horses, who Bela proceeds to keep pace with until the final
- stretch where she pulls ahead and beats the other horse by a length.
-
- "Your right, She is fast. But that name has got to go. I know, since
- she is no longer a simple farm animal, we'll call her 'The One Who Is No
- Longer'. Mysterious and strange enough, it'll fit."
- ***
- In the stables, The One Who Is No Longer, gets to know her new
- neighbors. "Hi, I'm the One Who Is No Longer, have you been here long?"
- she nickers.
-
- "For quite some time actually, and I see that they hung a really
- ridiculous name on you," replies the stallion next to her. "I'm Sir
- Empiess, supposedly named for some fighter from the First Age, but my
- real name is Mikel."
-
- The pair hit it off reasonably well, and Mikel eventually shows her the
- real meaning of his name.
- ***
- Bela goes through and has an amazing streak of wins, and eventually winds
- her up as an entrant in the Big Race, the Ebou Dar Derby. Unfortunately,
- some ruthless fiend has stolen the big prize, not that it was worth
- anything, but now they had nothing to award the winner. But the
- Derbymaster remembers some old stuff in his aunt's attic, and figures
- that something from there should do fine.
- ***
- Its the day of the race, and Nynaeve can't stop complaining. "Why did Mat
- have to drag us here to this. I don't care if Mat says he has dice
- rolling around in his head, we should be out looking for the ter'angreal."
-
- "You know that wouldn't do us any good, today. The whole city has shut down
- for this race, we wouldn't want to stand out," comes the standard retort
- from Elayne. "C'mon, this could be fun. Here come the horses now. Wait a
- second, that brown mare, isn't that Bela."
-
- "No it couldn't be. How did she get here," Nyneave exclaims as she yanks
- on her braid. "Why those Aes Sedai. Turning Bela into a race horse, and
- with a name like that, When I get a hold of Sheriam, I'll.."
-
- "Nyneave, relax, lets go down and stop her from making a fool of
- herself." But Elayne's good motives are blunted as they hear the
- starting horn, sending the horses around the track. Bela and Sir Empiess
- battle it out around the track and in a final spurt Bela beats Sir
- Empiess by a nose.
-
- Just as The One Who Is No Longer is brought to the Winner's Circle,
- Nyneave and Elayne catch up with her. Nyneave begins to ask what is
- going on when Elayne gasps "Nyneave, look, its the Bowl. They're giving
- the Bowl to Bela's rider. After all this time searching for the Bowl, it
- gets dropped in our lap."
-
- After a long drawn out fight, Nyneave and Elayne manage to get the Bowl
- from Bela's rider and make their way back to Salidar. Much to her
- enjoyment, Bela gets forgotten and gets to spend the rest of her days
- with Sir Empiess and away from those troublesome kids.
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 8 *
- ***********
- Author: Erica Sedai (erica@cc.gatech.edu)
-
- ************************ ************************
- * FIRST PRIZE * * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Exciting Entry * * Most Novel Entry *
- ************************ *********[TIE]**********
-
- The night was dark and no one was around. Bela moved cautiously
- as she nosed her way out of her stall. Carefully she sniffed the
- evening breeze but there was no recent scent of human. Good, she
- thought to herself, this can be quick and clean.
-
- To her practiced hooves, the stable door opened and closed quickly
- and she was free in the night air. No time to enjoy it though.
- That would have to wait for later. She had important work to
- be done and precious little time to do it.
-
- Keeping her eyes moving back and forth (for she could not see
- well directly in front of her), she moved carefully down the
- lane into Salidar proper. It was not hard to find the door.
- Her instructions had been quite clear. Bela raised a hoof, quietly
- striking the door three time and then moving back into the shadows.
- The door opened and a woman's figure emerged. "What? Who?" it said.
- And then the woman noticed Bela waiting in the shadows.
-
- "A horse?" the woman began. "What's a horse..."
-
- Before she could continue, Bela made the sign. The woman recognized it.
- It was an imperative. No one who had sworn to the Great Lord could
- not respond. The woman knelt before Bela. Good.
-
- Bela reached out with her muzzle to make direct contact with the
- kneeling woman. A series of images flashed through her mind as
- she delivered the orders she had been given. "That's odd" Bela
- thought. "This does not feel like a woman's mind...I could swear
- that..." But there wasn't time to ask questions and who was she
- to question the ways of the Great Lord.
-
- As always, Bela strained to retain some of the pictures of her message
- but they were like grains of sand sifting through her hooves. Something
- about an a'dam. An order to kill a man who could channel. A few
- pictures of dancing. And that was all. Bela struggled to keep as much
- as she might. Every clue no matter how small might help her in her
- quest to become the Neigh'blis. Over three thousand years of work
- already invested that must not be wasted by missed details.
-
- Her message delivered, Bela shook her head and turned back to the
- stables. There were four left, she thought. Herself, Aldieb,
- Pips and the new one. The one called Stayer, although in private
- his true name, "Slayer", was likely to slip out. Aldieb she dismissed.
- Ever since the Dragon had killed Aldieb's Aes Sedai (Bela snorted
- at the name--how could these weak pathetic girls claim such titles?)
- Aldieb had retreated into her other plots. She had some plans for
- maneuvering Mandarb into accompanying her to Shayol Ghul, but that
- was not likely to come to fruition. Pips was keeping close to the
- Dragon's Ta'veren friend "Mat". Bela remembered him from the long
- years spent monitoring Tam al'Thor's whereabouts. A shifty lad,
- ripe for the picking. A tasty treat to bring to the knees of
- the Great Lord, but not so sweet as that of a Child Amyrlin.
- "Oh Egwene, you were touched by the taint long before Fain had you
- in his dungeon. I saw to that. You are mine, body, mind and soul.
- It won't be long before you recognize that."
-
- Slayer was too new to the game to be easily valued. She'd be
- watching for him. He, like Bela, could apparently move bodily
- through Tel'Aran'Rhiod. A dangerous player. One, perhaps, who
- could be eliminated through nettles in his feed. Bela threw
- her head back at the thought. Nettles would be...an adequate
- solution.
-
- Six down and three to go, she thought. When Shadar Equus returned,
- perhaps the question of who was in the Great Lord's favor would
- be greatly simplified. Bela carefully let herself back into the
- stable, shutting the door behind her and returning to her stall.
-
-
- ***********
- * ENTRY 9 *
- ***********
- Authors: Sir Hawkbite and Det. Hohn Darlow
- (garrett@cs.unc.edu, donh@netcom.com)
-
- ************************
- * HONORABLE MENTION *
- ************************
- POINT:
- I hold to the theory (I may be the only one) that Bela was an Aes Sedai
- who was stilled and turned into a horse in the Aiel War. And, Elyas
- Machera was her warder. Like other Aes Sedai who have been changed
- into other creatures, she was sent off (to Master al'Vere), given a
- job appropriate to her new form (short rides and occasionally pulling
- a cart), and sent to a far away place (the Two Rivers) to hopefully
- survive. Fortunately for her, after a few years, she has become
- involved with Aes Sedai who may eventually rescue her and undo the
- awful changes wrought upon her.
-
- COUNTER POINT:
- This has one major flaw -- it is not clear that the One Power can
- be used to turn a human being into a different sort of animal. Perhaps
- sub-cellular control of DNA via very fine weavings would make this
- possible, but I prefer to suppose that Bela (pardon me, Bela Sedai)
- had the _illusion_ of being a horse imposed on her. (In which case, the
- race to Taren Ferry in tEotW must have been particularly exhausting for
- her.)
-
- Other than this one quibble, your entire theory (perhaps "hypothesis"
- would be a better word at this point?) makes excellent sense, especially
- Bela will be one of the exiled Aes Sedai recalled to the tower by
- Elaida. Whether she will be returned to her original form or not remains
- an open question, but I would bet that Elaida will assign her the task of
- attempting to stop the army of Salidar. But her friendship with Egwene
- will convince her to change sides, and she will play a pivotal role
- in the defeat of Elaida and the Red forces.
-
- (On the other hand, does she really want to be friends with the woman
- who rode her unmercifully from Emond's Field to Taren Ferry, not to
- mention forcing her to carry _Perrin_ half the time across the Caralain
- Grass?)
-
- ************
- * ENTRY 10 *
- ************
- Author: Mark the Loy (mloy@indyvax.iupui.edu)
-
- ************************
- * SECOND PRIZE *
- * Most Humorous Entry *
- ************************
-
- "Heh, Virgil...this horse we bought sure has been looking at me funny."
-
- "Funny? Fred, what the Hell you talkin' about? Oh, maybe you mean, kinda
- dreamy eyed like, huh? Well that's because Bertha really likes you, boy."
-
- "Bela. Her name is Bela, not Bertha."
-
- "What? Bela, Bertha, whatever...it's a horse, for light's sake. Anyway,
- she looks at you that way cause she wants you to give her a great big kiss
- on the lips...I mean she *really* likes you, Fred. But don't you give in
- to them impulses, boy...it ain't entirely natural"
-
- "Kiss her?! What the Hell, she's been a good ol' horse and as the miles
- have added up, she's been looking prettier and prettier as time goes
- by...come here, Bela baby, and give uncle Fred a little sugar."
-
- <SMOOCH!>
-
- <POOF!>
-
- "What the...what happened, what's all this smoke, Fred? Fred? Where are
- you? For the love of Pete, what in the bloody world just happened?"
-
- "Ah, that's *much* better. If you'll be quiet a minute, I'll tell you what
- just happened..."
-
- "What? Who the Hell are you? Where's Fred? Listen missy, I don't want no
- trouble, and I don't normally like to hurt a woman, but if you don't tell
- me right this exact second where my buddy Fred is
- I'll...Arrgghh...Uuggh...wait...you must be an Aes Sedai wit...Eeegh...quit
- it, c'mon now, stop it, put me down! Let me go you darned
- cu...Ahhhhrggh!"
-
- "No I won't let you down until you learn some manners. My name is Bela,
- but you may call me whatever you want when I'm out of sight but until
- then...*don't speak at all*...or else I'll turn you into a companion for
- Fred here."
-
- "Fred? That's not Fred...that's Bela...Er, eh, I mean that *was* Bela..."
-
- "Almost correct, I am and always will be the one and only Bela. This poor
- unfortunate "horse" is named Fred. And he will be my...shall we say,
- riding companion on my journey back to Tar Valon. Let's go, Fred. We've a
- long journey ahead of us and I'm anxious to get started. Goodbye,
- Virgil...be thankful you gave me that carrot yesterday or I'd be weaving a
- little Spirit, Earth, and Fire to turn you into something a little less
- human, although surely more appealing."
-
- "Oh no...I told Fred not to go about doing unnatural type things with that
- critter...I guess I should just be thankful he never got past the foreplay,
- then she'd *really* be pissed..."
-
-
- --
- ===========================ERICA SADUN================================
- And Sadunly, as in an uffish thought she stood, with eyes of flame.
- erica@cc.gatech.edu
- ======================================================================
-
-