Club Amiga de Montreal - CAM/CAM_CD_1.iso/files/551.lha/Cookie/Cookie.dat

Text File | 1991-09-08 | 38.2 KB | 1,314 lines

$3,000,000

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A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.

A clean, neat, and orderly work place is a sure sign of a sick mind.

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way
that you will look forward to the trip.

A generation which ignores history has no past -- and no future.

A gift of flowers will soon be made to you.

A gleekzorp without a tornpee is like a quop without a fertsneet (sort of).

A hollow voice says, "Plugh".

A king's castle is his home.

A lie in time saves nine.

A lost ounce of gold may be found, a lost moment of time, never.

A man who smiles in the face of adversity has thought of someone he can
blame it on.

A man who turns green has eschewed protein.

A man without a God is like a fish without a bicycle.

A motion to adjourn is always in order.

A penny saved is ridiculous.

A plucked goose doesn't lay golden eggs.

A present, over which you will shed tears of joy.

A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.

A reverence for life does not require one to respect nature's obvious
mistakes.

A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago.

A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.

A vivid and creative mind characterizes you.

A wise man can see more from a mountain top than a fool can from the bottom of
a well.

Accident:  A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body
is better.

According to the latest official figures, 43% of all statistics are totally
worthless.

Accordion:  A bagpipe with pleats.

Accuracy:  The vice of being right

"Acting is an art which consists of keeping the audience from coughing."

Admiration:  Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

Adult:  One old enough to know better.

Afternoon:  That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted the
morning.

Alexander Graham Bell is alive and well in New York, and still waiting for a
dial tone.

"All my friends and I are crazy.  That's the only thing that keeps us sane."

Always store beer in a dark place.

Always yield to temptation, for it may not pass your way again.

"Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy."
                                             -- Charlie McCarthy

Among the lucky, you are the chosen one.

"An American is a man with two arms and four wheels."
                                             -- A Chinese child

An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.

Another good night not to sleep in a eucalyptus tree.

Antonym:  The opposite of the word you're trying to think of.

Artistic ventures highlighted.  Rob a museum.

"As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and
as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality."
                                             --Einstein

As the trials of life continue to take their toll, remember that there is
always a future in Computer Maintenance.

Avert misunderstanding by calm, poise, and balance.

Avoid September.

Bank error in your favor.  Collect $200.

Barometer:  An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we
are having.

Be self-reliant and your success is assured.

Beauty and harmony are as necessary to you as the very breath of life.

Beauty seldom recommends one woman to another.

Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all
doubt.

Better to use medicines at the outset than at the last moment.

Beware of friends who are false and deceitful.

Beware of low-flying butterflies.

Beware the granfalloon.

Blessed are they who Go Around in Circles, for they Shall be Known as Wheels.

Boy:  A noise with dirt on it.

Brain:  The apparatus with which we think that we think.

Buy low, sell high.

By failing to prepare, you prepare to fail.

By following the good, you learn to be good.

Cabbage:  A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a
man's head.

"California is a fine place to live -- if you happen to be an orange."
                                             -- Fred Allen

Caution:  Breathing may be hazardous to your health.

Celebrate Hannibal Day this year.  Take an elephant to lunch.

Certainly the game is rigged.  Don't let that stop you; if you don't bet, you
can't win.

Chicken Little was right.

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to
teach them good manners.

Children seldom misquote you.  In fact, they usually repeat word for word what
you shouldn't have said.

"Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum -- 'I think that I think, therefore I think that
I am.'"
                                             -- Ambrose Bierce

Collaboration:  A literary partnership based on the false assumption that the
other fellow can spell.

Communists do it without class.

Computers are not intelligent.  They only think they are.

Condense soup, not books!

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that somebody is looking.

Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius.

Conversation:  A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath
is called the listener.

Courage is your greatest present need.

Coward:  One who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.

Creditors have much better memories than debtors.

Cynic:  One who looks through rose-colored glasses with a jaundiced eye.

Dawn:  The time when men of reason go to bed.

Day of inquiry.  You will be subpoenaed.

Deliberation:  The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is
buttered on.

"Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud
what the country could do under first-class management."
                                             -- Senator Soaper

Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won't see his face.

Did you know that clones never use mirrors?

Did you know that noone ever reads these things?

Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.

Do not clog intellect's sluices with knowledge of questionable uses.

Do not drink coffee in early A.M.  It will keep you awake until noon.

Do not read this fortune under penalty of law. Violators will be
prosecuted. (Penal Code sec. 2.3.2 (II.a.))

Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.

Do you know where _your_ towel is?

Domestic happiness and faithful friends.

Don't be overly suspicious where it's not warranted.

Don't believe everything you hear or anything you say.

Don't feed the bats tonight.

Don't get yourself involved with persons or situations that can't bear
inspection.

Don't go surfing in South Dakota for a while.

Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.

Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today.

Don't knock President Fillmore.  He kept us out of Vietnam.

Don't panic.

Don't tell any big lies today.  Small ones can be just as effective.

Don't try to have the last word.  You might get it.

Don't worry over what other people are thinking about you.  They're too busy
worrying over what you are thinking about them.

Don't wrestle a pig in a mudhole.  You both get all dirty, and the pig enjoys
it.

Down with categeorical imperatives!

Draw your salary before spending it.

"Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing."

"Duct tape is like the force.  It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds
the universe together."
                                             -- Carl Zwanzig

Due to a shortage of devoted followers, the production of great leaders has
been discontinued.

EHPL ! IMAT ARPPDEI SNDI EHT AAgim 0030

eHpl ! Imat arppdei sndi eht aAgim 0300

Economy makes men independent.

Enjoy your life; be pleasant and gay, like the birds in May.

Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.

Even if the story isn't true, it does have a grain of sense and instruction to
it, and it's entertaining as well, so it's worth the telling.

Even the boldest zebra fear the hungry lion.

Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark.

Every purchase has its price.

Every successful person has had failures but repeated failure is no guarantee
of eventual success.

Everyone complains of his memory, no one of his judgment.

Everyone should know where his towel is.

Everything bows to success, even grammar.

Excellent day to have a rotten day.

Excellent time to become a missing person.

Executive ability is prominent in your make-up.

Expect a letter from a friend who will ask a favor of you.

"Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you recognize a mistake when
you make it again."
                                             -- F.P. Jones

Expertise in one field does not carry over into other fields.  But experts
often think so.

Faith goes out through the window when beauty comes in at the door.

Familiarity breeds attempt.

Far duller than a serpent's tooth it is to spend a quiet youth.

"Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western
spiral arm of the galaxy lies a small, unregarded yellow sun.  Orbiting this
at a distance of roughly ninety million miles is an utterly insignificant
little blue-green planet, whose dominant life forms are so amazingly primitive
that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea."

"Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every
six months."
                                             -- Oscar Wilde

Fine day to throw a party.  Throw him as far as you can.

Fine day to work off excess energy.  Steal something heavy.

For people who like that kind of book, that is the kind of book they will
like.

From listening comes wisdom and from speaking repentance.

Future looks spotty.  You will spill soup in late evening.

Garter:  An elastic band intended to keep a woman from coming out of her
stockings and desolating the country.

Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.

Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why you
should.

Give thought to your reputation.  Consider changing name and moving to a new
town.

Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.

Go placidly amid the noise and waste, and remember what value there may be in
owning a piece thereof.

God gives us relatives; thank goodness we can chose our friends.

Good day for a change of scene.  Repaper the bedroom wall.

Good day for overcoming obstacles.  Try a steeplechase.

Good day to let down old friends who need help.

Good health will be yours for a long time.

Good news from afar can bring you a welcome visitor.

Good news!  Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.

"Growing old ain't for sissies!"
                                             -- Bette Davis

Have you ever noticed that radical ideas that are rejected by society
become societies that reject radical ideas?

He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.

He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.

He walks as if balancing the family tree on his nose.

"He was so crooked you could use him to pull corks with..."

"He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes..."

He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals.

He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.

He who has had, has been, but he who hasn't been, has been had.

He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.

He who invents adages
For others to peruse
Takes along rowboat
When going on a cruise.

He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.

Help a swallow land at Capistrano.

Here comes the orator, with his flood of words and his drop of reason.

Hindsight is an exact science.

His life was formal; his actions seemed ruled with a ruler.

History books which contain no lies are extremely dull.

History doesn't repeat itself.  Historians merely repeat each other.

"Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people."
                                             -- W.C. Fields

How many "coming men" has one known!  Where on earth do they all go to?

How sharper than a hound's tooth it is to have a thankless serpent.

How you look depends on where you go.

Hummingbirds never remember the words to songs.

I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.

"I don't have any solution but I certainly admire the problem."
                                             -- Ashleigh Brilliant

I don't remember ever having had the itch, and yet scratching is one of
nature's sweet pleasures, and so handy.

I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.

I like work; it fascinates me; I can sit and look at it for hours.

"I may not be totally perfect, but parts of me are excellent."
                                             -- Ashleigh Brilliant

I must have slipped a disk - my pack hurts.

I never fail to convice an audience that the best thing they could do was to
go away.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.

I've given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.

If "everybody knows" such-and-such, then it ain't so, by at least ten thousand
to one.

"If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith."
                                             -- Albert Einstein

If at first you don't succeed, give up; no use being a damn fool.

If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?

If it pours before seven, it has rained by eleven.

If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on vacation.

"If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder."
                                             -- Pope John Paul I

If we do not change our direction we are likely to end up where we are headed.

If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it.  Quit work and play
for once.

If you continually give you will continually have.

If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost.

If you don't like yourself, you can't like other people.

If you make a mistake you right it immediately to the best of your ability.

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you really
make them think they'll hate you.

If you suspect a man, don't employ him.

If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens tomorrow!

If you water it and it dies, it's a plant.
If you pull it out by the roots and it grows back, it's a weed.

If you wish to succeed, consult three old people.

If you wish, You will have an opportunity.

If you would keep a secret from an enemy, tell it not to a friend.

Iffen it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Iffen it ain't cooked, don't serve it.

Ignore previous fortune cookie.

I'll have you know, sir, that I cannot be bought. However if you want to rent
me for a while, well...

"Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality."
                                             -- Jules de Gaultier

In a family argument, if it turns out you are right -- apologize at once!

Ingrate:  A man who bites the hand that feeds him, and then complains of
indigestion.

Inside every big problem is a small problem trying to get out.

It is Fortune, not wisdom that rules man's life.

It is a poor judge who cannot award a prize.

"It is bad luck to be superstitious."
                                             -- Andrew W. Mathis

It is better to have loved and lost than to have hated and won.

It is better to kiss an avocado than to get in a fight with an aardvark

It is better to wear out than to rust out.

It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

It is easier to run down a hill than up one.

It is far better to be deceived than to be undeceived by those we love.

It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to
do.

It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

It is much easier to suggest solutions when you know nothing about the
problem.

It is said that the lonely eagle flies to the mountain peaks while the lowly
ant crawls the ground, but cannot the soul of the ant soar as high as the
eagle?

"It is the business of the future to be dangerous."
                                             -- Hawkwind

It is the wise bird who builds his nest in a tree.

It seems like the less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.

It was a book to kill time for those who liked it better dead.

It's a poor workman who blames his tools.

It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being too tired.

It's clever, but is it art?

It's not reality that's important, but how you perceive things.

It's sweet to be remembered, but it's often cheaper to be forgotten.

I used to be indecisive.  Now, I'm not so sure...

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they AREN'T really after you.

Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows
what it is.

Justice:  A decision in your favor.

Keep emotionally active.  Cater to your favorite neurosis.

Kin:  An affliction of the blood

Lend money to a bad debtor and he will hate you.

Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.

Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.

Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.

Let's just be friends and make no special effort to ever see each other again.

Lie:  A very poor substitute for the truth, but the only one discovered to
date.

Life is a yo-yo, and mankind ties knots in the string.

Life is like an onion:  you peel off layer after layer, then you find there is
nothing in it.

Life is to you a dashing and bold adventure.

Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone.

Lonely is a man without love.

Lonely men seek companionship.  Lonely women sit at home and wait.  They never
meet.

LOOK OUT!  Behind you!

Love is in the offing.  Be affectionate to one who adores you.

Love is sentimental measles.

Love the sea?  I Dote upon it - from the beach.

Mad:  Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence

Make a wish, it might come true.

"Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to."
                                             -- Mark Twain

Man's horizons are bounded by his vision.

Many a family tree needs trimming.

Many changes of mind and mood; do not hesitate too long.

Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket bibles which are on very very
thin paper.

"Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly."
                                             -- VOLTAIRE

Men seldom show dimples to girls who have pimples.

Menu:  A list of dishes which the restaurant has just run out of

Message will arrive in the mail.  Destroy, before the FBI sees it.

"Might as well be frank, monsieur.  It would take a miracle to get you out of
Casablanca."

Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate.

Misfortune:  The kind of fortune that never misses.

Miss:  A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are
in the market.

Misster, do you vant to buy a duck?

Mistakes are oft the stepping stones to failure.

Monday:  In Christian countries, the day after the football game.

Money cannot buy love, nor even friendship.

Money is the root of all evil, and a man needs roots.

Money is truthful.  If a man speaks of his honor, make him pay cash.

Money may buy friendship but money cannot buy love.

Money will say more in one moment than the most eloquent lover can in years.

My cup hath runneth'd over with love.

My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life
there.

Never appeal to a man's "better nature".  He may not have one.

Never be led astray onto the path of virtue.

Never call a man a fool; borrow from him.

Never drink from your finger bowl - it contains only water.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.

Never say you know a man until you have divided an inheritance with him.

Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.

Never try to outstubborn a cat.

Next Friday will not be your lucky day.  As a matter of fact, you don't have a
lucky day this year.

Nice guys get sick.

Nihilism should commence with oneself.

No generalization is true -- not even this one.

No matter where you go on a bicycle, it will always be uphill and into the
wind.

No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing.

Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.

Nudists are people who wear one-button suits.

Ocean:  A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man --
who has no gills.

Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal.

Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts - for support rather
than illumination.

Old men are fond of giving good advice to console themselves for their
inability to give bad examples.

On a clear disk you can seek forever.

One family builds a wall, two families enjoy it.

One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true.

Only a sadistic scoundrel -- or a fool -- tells the bald truth on social
occasions.

Only adults have difficulty with childproof caps.

Others will look to you for stability, so hide when you bite your nails.

Our country has plenty of good five-cent cigars, but the trouble is they
charge fifteen cents for them.

Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing to go
through hell to get it.

People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of
them.

People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.

People will buy anything that's one to a customer.

Perfect day for scrubbing the floor and other exciting things.

Pity the poor corpuscle, for he labors in vein.

Please ignore previous fortune.

Please take note:

Post no bills.

Predestination was doomed from the start.

Preserve the old, but know the new.

Pro is to con as progress is to Congress.

Promptness is its own reward, if one lives by the clock instead of the sword.

Proper treatment can cure a cold in seven days -- but left to itself it'll
hang on for a week.

Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the Grand
Canyon and waiting for the echo.

Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust.

Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth.

Put your trust in those who are worthy.

Raising pet electric eels is gaining a lot of current popularity.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle science fiction.

Recent investments will yield a slight profit.

Remember that two wrongs do not make a right -- but that three lefts do.

Remember, even if you win the rat race -- you're still a rat.

Reputation:  what others are not thinking about you.

Rotate left! Rotate right!
Push on, pop off,
BYTE, BYTE, BYTE!

Satire does not look pretty upon a tombstone.

Share and enjoy.

Shared pain is lessened; shared joy is increased.

She's learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time putting into
words.

Show your affection, which will probably meet with pleasant response.

"Simian witness, simian execute."
                                             -- Alex Trebec

Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all.

Small change can often be found under seat cushions.

Some men are discovered; others are found out.

Some rise by sin and some by virtue fall.

Someone is speaking well of you.

Someone is unenthusiastic about your work.

Someone whom you reject today, will reject you tomorrow.

Standing on head makes smile of frown, but rest of face also upside down.

Stay away from flying saucers today.

Stay away from hurricanes for a while.

Stop searching forever. Happiness is just next to you.

Stop searching forever. Happiness is unattainable.

Surprise due today.  Also the rent.

Surprise your boss.  Get to work on time.

Swap read error.  You lose your mind.

Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.

Ten years of rejection slips is nature's way of telling you to stop writing.

"That must be wonderful! I don't understand it at all."

Thank you for observing ALL safety precautions.

The attacker must vanquish; the defender need only survive.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average
man can see better than he can think.

The best prophet of the future is the past.

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

"The cow is nothing but a machine with makes grass fit for us people to eat."
                                             -- John McNulty

The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only much, much heavier.

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.

The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to
build better mice.

The hardest thing is to disguise your feelings when you put a lot of relatives
on the train for home.

The heart is wiser than the intellect.

The light at the end of the tunnel is merely the headlight of an
oncoming train.

The light of a hundred stars does not equal the light of the moon.

The luck that is ordained for you will be coveted by others.

The minute a man is convinced that he is interesting, he isn't.

The only rose without thorns is friendship.

The person you rejected yesterday could make you happy, if you say yes.

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of
your action.

The shortest distance between two points is under construction.

The star of riches is shining upon you.

The time is right to make new friends.

The truth of a proposition has nothing to do with its credibility.  And vice
versa.

The universe is laughing behind your back.

The way to make a small fortune in the commodities market is to start with a
large one.

The weaklings died on the way and the cowards never started.

The weed of crime bears bitter fruit.

The wise shepherd never trusts his flock to a smiling wolf.

The world is an 8000 mile in diameter spherical pile of dirt.

The world is coming to an end!  Repent and return those library books!

There ain't no such thing as a free lunch.

There are few people more often in the wrong than those who cannot endure to
be thought so.

There are many people today who literally do not have a close personal friend.


There are more old drunkards than old doctors.

There are no games on this system.

There are three things I have always loved and never understood - art, music,
and women.

There is a great discovery still to be made in Literature: that of paying
literary men by the quantity they do NOT write.

"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what
the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be
replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened."

There is always someone worse off than yourself.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear.

There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.

There will be big changes for you but you will be happy.

There's always one more bug.

There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.

They're only trying to make me LOOK paranoid!

Things are more like they used to be than they are now.

Things will be bright in P.M.  A cop will shine a light in your face.

Think of your family tonight.  Try to crawl home after the computer crashes.

Think twice before speaking. But don't say "think, think, click, click".

This file will self-destruct in five minutes.

This fortune cookie program out of order.  For those in desperate need, please
use the program "randchar".  This program generates random characters, and,
given enough time, will undoubtedly come up with something profound.  It will,
however, take it no time at all to be more profound than THIS program has ever
been.

This fortune intentionally left blank.

"This guy walked into my office one day and started talking about this science
fiction show he had in mind. He called it 'Star Trek'. I remember saying, 'It
sounds marvelous, whatever the hell it is.' And I remember thinking, 'Oh, my
God! This will never sell!'"
                                             --Oscar Katz,
                                               speaking of Gene Roddenberry

This is a *dangerous* place.

This space intentionally left blank.

This will be a memorable month -- no matter how hard you try to forget it.

To steal from one is plagarism.  To steal from many is research.

Those who can't write, write manuals.

Those who can, do.  Those who can't, simulate.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach,
administrate.

Tilting at windmills hurts you more than the windmills.

Time is just nature's way of making sure that everything doesn't happen at once.

To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult to criticize the
competent.

To do is to be - Nietzsche
To be is to do - Sartre
Do be do be do - Sinatra

To give happiness is to deserve happiness.

To keep your friends treat them kindly; to kill them, treat them often.

To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools.

To refuse praise is to seek praise twice.

To save a single life is better than to build a seven story pagoda.

Today is a good day to bribe a high-ranking public official.

Tonight's the night:  Sleep in a eucalyptus tree.

Travel important today;  Internal Revenue men arrive tomorrow.

True happiness will be found only in true love.

Truth will be out this morning.  (Which may really mess things up.)

Try to divide your time evenly to keep others happy.

Try to value useful qualities in one who loves you.

"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent."
                                             -- Salvor Hardin

"Virtual" means never having to say you're out of RAM.

"Virtual" means never knowing where your next byte is coming from.

Vote anarchist

Wasting time is an important part of living.

Watch out for the old mortar in the rocks in the fourteenth hole trick.

We are tied down to a language which makes up in obscurity what it lacks in
style.

"We have met the enemy and not only is he ours, he is us."
                                             -- Walt Kelly

We prefer to speak evil of ourselves than not speak of ourselves at all.

We promise according to our hopes, and perform according to our fears.

We read to say that we have read.

We really don't have any enemies.  It's just that some of our best friends are
trying to kill us.

What is the difference between a Vitamin and a Hormone?  You can't make a
Vitamin.

What makes us so bitter against people who outwit us is that they think
themselves cleverer than we are.

What no spouse of a writer can ever understand is that a writer is working
when he's staring out the window.

What orators lack in depth they make up in length.

What passes for woman's intuition is often nothing more than man's
transparency.

What the hell?  Go ahead.  Put all your eggs in one basket.

What this country needs is a dime that will buy a good five-cent bagel.

What this country needs is a good five cent ANYTHING!

What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.

When God endowed human beings with brains, He did not intend to guarantee
them.

When the government bureau's remedies do not match your problem, you modify
the problem, not the remedy.

When the wind is great, bow before it; when the wind is heavy, yield to it.

"When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut."

When you become used to never being alone, you may consider yourself
Americanized.

When you go out to buy, don't show your silver.

Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.

Why did the Lord give us so much quickness of movement unless it was to avoid
responsibility?

"Why do I think that there is a Unified Field Theory?  Because God does not
play dice with the Cosmos."
                                             -- Albert Einstein

Winter is the season in which people try to keep the house as warm as it was
in the summer, when they complained about the heat.

With clothes the new are best, with friends the old are best.

Words are the voice of the heart.

Words must be weighed, not counted.

Worth seeing?  Yes, but not worth going to see.

Xerox never comes up with anything original.

"Xerox sues someone for COPYING?"
                                             -- David Letterman

You are a bundle of energy always on the go.

You are a fluke of the universe.

You are always busy.

You are capable of planning your future.

You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.

You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend.

You are going to have a new love affair.

You are heading for a land of sunshine.

You are magnetic in your bearing.

You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward.

You are secretive in your dealings but never to the extent of trickery.

You are standing on my toes.

You are tricky, but never to the point of dishonesty.

You are wise, witty, and wonderful, but you spend too much time reading this
sort of trash.

You can create your own opportunities this week.  Blackmail a senior
executive.

You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with earth is
concerned.

You can go wrong by being too skeptical as readily as by being too trusting.

You can't judge a book by the way it wears its hair.

You cannot kill time without injuring eternity.

You could get a new lease on life -- if only you didn't need the first and
last month in advance.

You display the wonderful traits of charm and courtesy.

You enjoy the company of other people.

You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.

You have a reputation for being thoroughly reliable and trustworthy.

You have a strong appeal for members of the opposite sex.

You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come first.

You have a truly strong individuality.

You have a will that can be influenced by all with whom you come in contact.

You have an ability to sense and know higher truth.

You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself.

You have an unusual equipment for success.  Be sure to use it properly.

You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human relationship.

You have been selected for a secret mission.

You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.

You have literary talent that you should take pains to develop.

You have many friends and very few enemies.

You have the capacity to learn from mistakes.  You'll learn a lot today.

You have the power to influence all with whom you come in contact.

You like to form new friendships and make new acquaintances.

You live and you learn -- or you don't live long.

You love peace.

You love your home and want it to be beautiful.

You may be recognized soon.  Hide.

You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.

You plan things that you do not even use because of your extreme caution.

You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.

You seek to shield those you love and you like the role of the provider.

You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.

You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.

You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.

You will be Told about it Tomorrow.  Go Home and Prepare Thyself.

You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be unimportant.

You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone.

You will be awarded some great honor.

You will be called upon to help a friend in trouble.

You will be given a post of trust and responsibility.

You will be honored for contributing your time and skill to a worthy cause.

You will be married within a year.

You will be recognized and honored as a community leader.

You will be singled out for promotion in your work.

You will be successful in love.

You will be surprised by a loud noise.

You will be surrounded by luxury.

You will engage in a profitable business activity.

You will gain money by a speculation or lottery.

You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.

You will have long and healthy life.

You will hear good news from one you thought unfriendly to you.

You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.

You will meet an important person who will help you advance professionally.

You will never know hunger.

You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.

You will receive a legacy which will place you above want.

You will soon meet a person who will play an important role in your life.

You will step on the soil of many countries.

You will win success in whatever calling you adopt.

You worry too much about your job.  Stop it.  You are not paid enough to
worry.

You're being followed.  Cut out the hanky-panky for a few days.

You've been leading a dog's life.  Stay off the furniture.

Your aims are high, and you are capable of much.

Your analyst has you mixed up with another patient.  Don't believe a thing he
tells you.

Your domestic life may be harmonious.

Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.

Your heart is pure, and your mind clear, and your soul devout.

Your love life will be happy and harmonious.

Your lover will never wish to leave you.

Your mind understands what you have been taught; your heart, what is true.

Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of good news soon.

Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.

Your present plans will be successful.

Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.

Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinement.

Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.

Your temporary financial embarassment will be relieved in a surprising manner.

Youth had been a habit of hers so long that she could not part with it.

Zipple grelbnot horbnofg asirvnig fzouple! Or something like that.