A Beginner's Guide to the Internet/INTERNET.ISO/text/usenet/faq/usenet03.faq

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Path: bloom-beacon.mit.edu!senator-bedfellow.mit.edu!faqserv
From: David DeLaney <[e-mail]>
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.computers,alt.usenet.kooks,alt.answers,news.answers
Subject: Net.Legends.FAQ (Noticeable Phenomena Of UseNet) Part 3/4
Supersedes: <net-legends-faq/[e-mail]>
Followup-To: poster
Date: 27 Nov 1994 15:09:30 GMT
Organization: Brown Ajah, r.a.sf.w.r-j Division
Lines: 1125
Approved: [e-mail]
Expires: 22 Feb 1995 15:08:06 GMT
Message-ID: <net-legends-faq/[e-mail]>
References: <net-legends-faq/[e-mail]>
Reply-To: [e-mail]
NNTP-Posting-Host: bloom-picayune.mit.edu
Summary: This FAQ gives information on some of the more noticeable or notable    people, places, and/or things occuring on UseNet. Not to be taken internally.
X-Last-Updated: 1994/09/15
Originator: [e-mail]
Xref: bloom-beacon.mit.edu alt.folklore.computers:55172 alt.usenet.kooks:11180 alt.answers:5894 news.answers:30107

Archive-name: net-legends-faq/part3
Posting-Frequency: Every 73 days
Last-modified: 9/13/94

Andrew Bulhak (Back off, man, I'm a kibologist):
 One of the more distinguishable of the a.r.k supporting cast. Will argue
(usually on the right side) at length, especially against Mike Dahmus (q.v.).
Will mercilessly parodize the clueless, and does a mean B1FF (q.v.)...
Has canonical .sigs which show up periodically. Conducted the vote to elect
the new Kibo (q.v.) (don't ask...), which Joel Furr (q.v.) ended up winning
(this apparently was bad for his usual good humor, though). [7/94: Joel has
passed the title on to one Daniel M Silevitch ([e-mail]), who may
or may not know what to do with it, but who asked "Why is Joel calling me
`James', anyway?...] Slavers in fear at the thought of new waves of
net.newbies; may be justified in this. Is reportedly in Kibo's killfile...
Came in first in the recent (5/94) vote for most evil net.personality, beating
Kibo by 192 votes (and Argic by 227); consensus seems to be that this is due
to his vote-trolling abilities rather than any residuum or effluent of pure
unrelenting evil. Posts as [e-mail] (Andrew Bulhak).

Puma!:
Contrib. post:
 Those who used to frequent the rec.arts.anime group still remember
the bizarreness that was
        PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!
        PUMA! Meddle-not-in-the-affairs-of-PUMAs-for PUMA!
        PUMA! you-are-crunchy-and-good-with-ketchup! PUMA!
        PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!PUMA!
--

Lewis Stiller ("Examine frames XXX through YYY of Aliens to see that..."):
 Alien (the movie) aficionado who was known for idiosyncratic cinematic analyses
and obscure---some say idiotic---posts. Crossposted to alt.religion.kibology
and rec.arts.sf.movies, semi-incessantly (he flooded a.r.k for about two weeks
with Alien posts and then dropped to `normal' (for a.r.k) posting frequency
and subjects - but often xposted to r.a.sf.m, causing some interesting
followup chains...). When posting on subjects other than Aliens, was
entertaining to read - sample quotations: "About an ai, an anoa, and an eft?",
"Pan-and-scan: what's the point?", "Higgledy-Piggledy / Kibo Ubiquitous, /
Greps for his name in the / Happynet spool. // Interdimensional / Cyberspace
deity: / Didaktyliaios / Dada is cool.". He has been Not Allowed (by Kibo) to
post about laserdiscs to a.r.k for a while until he fulfils some Kibo-imposed
condition which I (and he) disremember, possibly related to Terminator... and
has nearly ceased posting altogether, about the time the first version of this
FAQ came out... he says it's because he's too busy, and has a thesis to feed.
We'll miss him.
--
 Entertaining and totally non-serious (come *on*... Argic self-aware? it
is to laugh!) quote: "Well, maybe Terminator 3: Usenet becomes Skynet is a
bit of a stretch, but Terminator 3: Internet becomes Skynet could be a
reasonable plot. And what with the rtm worm, the increasing Net connectivity,
the .mil sites...I can see it. Like, what would happen if Serdar Argic became
self-aware?" [tying together the Imminent Death of UseNet perennial
threads, which were then focussing on Delphi, with then-current speculation
on the plot of T3...]
--
Contrib. post:
 As another nominee for the latter category, I offer for your
consideration Lewis Stiller, ALIENS aficionado, [Lewis says the correct
terminology is "ALIEN aficionado", please.] who singlehandedly triggered and
sustained a flamewar which must have doubled the volume of rec.arts.sf.movies.
Stiller tried to get an official net-vote to have ALIEN^3 removed from the list
of Alien movies, and argued his points in all areas with a precision grasp of
the Alien movies only possible to someone with an LD player and WAY too much
time on his hands.
--
This post's a collector's item - Sea Wasp is not *factually* incorrect that
often... Lewis held an unofficial (official? on Usenet? Hee hee)
rec.art.sf.movies vote to determine whether Alien fans consider Alien 3
canonical, i.e., part of the Alien/Aliens series. After long, vociferous and
acrimonious debate, from all sides, a bare majority of those responding (24-22)
voted that Alien 3 should not be considered part of the canon. Highlights of
the flamewar included detailed frame-by-frame analyses of key scenes in Alien
which Stiller used to support his position, and his fanatical insistence that
pan-and-scan VHS was an inappropriate way to watch Alien because pan-and-scan
destroys Scott's wide-screen compositions and the rhythm of his editing. Hey,
everybody's got to have a hobby... A miniFAQ by Lewis, explaining the Correct
Way To View A Movie, is available. Posts as [e-mail] (Lewis
Stiller).

Valeri Fabrikant (the only net.loon who actually killed people):
Contrib. post:
>I know this is in very bad taste, but what about that guy Fabrikant, who
>ranted incessantly for two weeks about a conspiracy at his university
>not to give him tenure (the newsgroup was sci.research; the university
>was somewhere in canada; montreal?).
 (Someone finally got sick of it and said "Well, why don't you do something
about it?".)
>He then went and shot half-a-dozen staff
>members! He posted something from jail later, I believe; or rather he
>wrote something on a laptop and had it posted. I probably still have the
>collection of posts.
>>His trial was very bizarre; he want through many lawyers and finally
>>"defended" himself; the cornerpiece of his defence, I believe, was to
>>call the judge a Muppet. Very sad, and very nasty.
[Actually, he called the members of the court, Muppets, and the judge, King
Muppet.]
>Hey, if you really want loons, be serious!
 Eeeeuuuuwww.  Tacky.  No Fabrikant.  Let's keep it light-hearted, ok?
---Bill "HELP!!! (sound made by man drowning in loons)" VanHorne
P.S. I said earlier that cataloging every loon on Usenet would mean
 cataloging 76.3% of all posters. I now think the number is closer
 to 86.3%. And rising.
--
> I beg to differ.  Prof. Fabrikant, a Soviet emigre, really was being screwed
>royally by the EE department at Concordia.  He spent almost 10 years there
>and did some outstanding research.  Still, they wouldn't grant him tenure and
>kept renewing his contract.  He claimed that his chairman and other professors
>in the position of power blackmailed him into putting their names as co-authors
>of his work.  This sounds quite plausible, considering that the chairman

It is standard practice in academia to put your chairman as co-author.

>co-authored hundreds of papers in various fields with numerous people in the
>department.  Fabrikant sued everyone in sight and was winning his case when,
>unfortunately, he snapped.  He brought a bagful of guns to the department and

Snapped?  He tried for nearly a year to get a gun permit, but nobody would
sign the part where it says that the applicant is mentally stable.  He even
threatened the life of the department secretary to get her to sign.
Obviously a very stable person.

>killed 5 people (mostly graduate students, I think).  It's a pity the
>chairman wasn't in the office.  That lazy bum...
> Also the judge in the case was obviously an anti-Semite prejudiced against
>Soviet emigres.

Maybe he was just prejudiced against people who call him a muppet.
--
[also from Bill:]
 I have also been asked *not* to include L. Detweiler the PSEUDOSPOOFING
ALERT guy, as a couple of people who know him think he's a Fabrikant in
the making, and are worried about the safety of someone who Detweiler
mentions in his posts and who lives near him in CO.
--
[The jury is still out on Detweiler; despite two attempts (so far) to
post to news.answers a version of the FAQ inveigled from the FAQmaker, which
may or may not have been altered, I decided to leave him in ... for now...]

Barbara Abernathy (I am an excellent example of why some people's
 newsreaders should be limited to alt.flame):
 Omnipresent on alt.flame; replies, quoting at great length, with
somewhat-varied insults. Not to everyone's taste. Caused an uproar by
posting an alt.flame-type message calling someone she was mad at a child
molestor to alt.sexual.abuse.recovery, and later took Serdar Argic's side
in a typical zumaBot-followup that somehow got crossposted to alt.bigfoot
*and* alt.tasteless... seemed to have no clue as to who/what the Bot was.
Consistently high in the #Posts lists, except that she apparently lost her
net.access for a while, but is now back. Posts as
baberna@{bcpl,awk,scheme}.cse.psu.edu (Barbara Abernathy); also posted for a
time from tan.crayola.somethingorother, leading to the "__X__ Your machine has
a stupid name" entry on the Standard UseNet Bonehead Reply Form...

Willis Carto:
 originator (?) of much of Dan Gannon's material; also inspired Boris (you
cannot buy ham in Toronto because the Jooooos have taken over) Kuschel, along
with the other alt.revisionism nuts, Joe Gaut (a regular sparring partner of
Ted Frank's, and a tireless proponent of the proposition that everything
printed in "The spotlight" is gospel) and Lance Bledsoe (Audit The Fed!
Audit the Fed! It is evil!)
Contrib. post:
 Willis Carto is, as I remember, a founder, or, at least, a leading
light, of the Liberty Lobby, who are publishers of the *Spotlight* and
basically an anti-Semitic bunch.  I think he antedates USENET (that
bunch may date back to the '50's or so).
 I think Bledsoe is just a John Bircher, although I may be confusing him
with *another* John Bircher in "alt.conspiracy".
--

Joseph Dunphy:
Contrib. post:
 [Joseph Dunphy] of sci.research.careers and a few other places deserves
honorable mention. i didn't discover sci.research.careers until the week after
Fabrikant hit the news, so i can't tell you whether dunphy ever interacted
with Fabrikant.
--

Rob Reinhardt (The UN is a conspiracy):
 thinks the UN should be reorganized to make us better prepared for
when the aliens ask us to join the Federation.

Claire Gilbert (my Florida eyes can see the smoke from the Kuwaiti oil fires
 which is causing our weather to change -- really!):
Contrib. post:
 A PFH [poster from Hell?] on sci.<many> was so obnoxious her sysadmin had
to be begged to cease and desist her. At the time I was using VNEWS which
had no killfile capability. This PFH actually made me decide to learn Unix
with the express purpose of getting a newsreader (trn) with kill capability.
--

Homer Wilson Smith (Certainty of existence implies certainty of DESIRE and
 |certainty of LOSS, unbearable loss and pain):
 from alt.clearing.technology and/or alt.religion.scientology . A mini-FAQ is
available for him. Posts as [e-mail] or
[e-mail] (Homer Wilson Smith).

ZiPpY:
Contrib. post:
 on the hashnet, who is guaranteed to jump into every thread, and claims to
know everybody personally. Every time the conversation veers towards
normality, he posts yet another song about sheep-fucking.
--

Jarmo:
 Famous in soc.culture.nordic, wages a constant battle against everybody
else in the group, in his fight for the Finnish-speaking minority in
Sweden. He has even posted to soc.culture.celtic asking the Welsh to help
in his struggle. He got very little response. Either the Welsh people have
no interest, or they have trouble understanding his posts, which are in a
mixture of Swedish and Finnish. A bummer for the Welsh!

Dimitri Vulis:
Contrib. post:
 whose obnoxious, derivative and not-very-funny Soviet emigre jokes from
Brighton Beach were a weekly feature about a year ago on rec.humor . He
ignored completely any requests to stop. Eventually he started getting
flamed in demotic Russian-quite fun for those of us who could read it.
- Dan "And to think he felt it important enough to waste his two hours of daily
connect time on it" Case
--
 so what _is_ the deal with vulis?  is "russian emigre" a codeword for
"jew", or for "russian emigre", or for something else?  (if i recall
correctly, minor and now somewhat reformed net.loon mikhail zeleny
claimed rather convincingly that vulis's posts contained certain
tell-tale phrases which are highly un-idiomatic in english
("dandruff-covered" was one of them, i think) which were dead
giveaways of classic pathological russian anti-semitism.)  so is vulis
russian?  an emigre?  a jew in some sense?  self-hating?  maybe a
self-hating russian jewish emigre who hates only the jewish half of
themself?  or maybe they hate the russian half too?  are they now or
have they ever been, while residing in america, on the payroll of any
branch of any soviet or russian government?  did they stop posting
russian emigre jokes when the paychecks stopped coming?  are they a
zhirinovsky supporter now?  the most recent messages posted by vulis
that i have seen seem designed mainly to convince people that both
zhirinovsky and valery fabrikant are (russian?) jews.  (it's very
likely true in fabrikant's case, at least.)  maybe vulis is a
self-hating supporter of zhirinovsky and fabrikant?
--
Posts on soc.culture.soviet, and is apparently something of an institution
there; likes to stir things up, and to flame and/or troll people. I'm not up
on which sides are good and/or bad on s.c.s, which among other things seems
to have been ravaged by Serdar Argic for a long time as well, driving away many
of the gentler posters. Is currently engaged in flamewar with Peter V.
Vorobieff there. Posts from [e-mail] (Dimitri Vulis, CUNY GC
Math).

Roy Radow:
 Passionate defender of NAMBLA on several of the gay-oriented newsgroups.
Not really loon material (depending on your take on the subject, of course) -
just believes there should be no (or at least a lower than currently available)
minimum age of consent for sexual relations, and has NAMBLA in his .sig. May
kiboze for NAMBLA. Unfortunately for his cause, people tend to groan out loud
when the Dread Word is mentioned, more because it's a Thread That Will Not
Die/Permanent Floating Flamewar than anything else, and that's in fact the
main reason I'm including him [because he's notable for, just by posting,
without even mentioning it in the post, touching off ThreadsTWND]...
Posts as [e-mail] (Roy Radow).

STella (bisexual leatherbyke pagan):
 alt.sex.* denizen. Mistress of the sarcastic flame. Helped found
alt.sex.bondage; hangs out there. A mini-FAQ is available (for the
non-maturity-challenged only). Not a loon - just has a distinctively..
ah.. unrestrained posting style. Has been referenced (along with Kibo) in
at least one guide to the Internet. Posts as [e-mail]
and [e-mail] (STella).

Elf! Sternberg:
 Seemingly omnipresent in any group having anything remotely to do with
sex or sexual orientation (recently sighted on rec.pets.herp, even). Try
alt.sex.wizards, alt.sex, or alt.sex.motss; Generally gives very good advice.
Posts the "Journal Entry" series of sex stories on alt.sex.stories/
alt.sex.motss/alt.sex . Quoted (sometimes extensively) in the alt.sex.*
FAQs. Cordially despised on soc.motss - but then nearly everyone on soc.motss
is cordially despised by someone else there... Posts from [e-mail]
(Elf Sternberg).

Gharlane of Eddore:
 Semi-master flamer. Notable chiefly for his nearly unbreakable habit of
setting followups to alt.dev.null, apparently in the belief that noone else's
words deserve to follow his. Can be seen on rec.arts.sf.written and alt.flame,
as well as alt.fan.mike-jittlov . Posts as [e-mail] (Gharlane
of Eddore).

Ted Altar:
 From rec.food.veg. Was semi-single-handedly responsible for prolonging
the discussion on whether or not to split r.f.v, and if so how, in
news.groups, past all humanly bearable length. The ultimate upshot of this
was the creation of rec.food.veg.cooking (moderated)...
Contrib. post:
 He did manage to kill one [proposal] when catsclaw was suggested as
moderator by using ad hominem attacks, but he couldn't stop the next
proposal, back[ed] by Stephanie da Silva (q.v.), featuring group moderation.
--
Posts as [e-mail] (Ted Altar).

John Stanley:
 Was waging single-handed a flamewar in news.groups (12/93) on what
the meaning, if any, of ABSTAIN in a UseNet vote is/should be/must be.
Notable in this only because he was apparently alone on his side. On the
other hand, was also conducting a well-done offense against Dick Depew
(q.v.), pointing out repeatedly that his (Dick's) ARMM proposals are
nothing more nor less than censorship. He has ended up in Dick's killfile,
along with Joel Furr (q.v.), because of this. Will argue for food, or
apparently for free, if he thinks he's correct; usually has good points to
make (although tends to be scornful about it), and can find holes in opponents'
logic quicker than you can say DI$$EMINATION... Can be seen in news.groups
or news.admin.*; I cannot say at this point exactly what he'll be arguing
*about*, but it's a fairly good bet he'll be arguing about *something*.
Posts as [e-mail] (John Stanley).

Tim Pierce ("No.") and Joel Furr ("Will create newsgroups for food"):
 Not loons, exactly - Tim was a sysadmin at Amherst and moderates
rec.arts.erotica; just very very cynical (Tim) and very very optimistic
(Joel). Found on alt.config (Tim ambushing alt.*-group proposers and Joel
proposing new alt.* groups at a great rate [and newgrouping them almost
as fast {in recognition of which many admins refuse to create *any* group
newgrouped by Joel]) and soc.motss, rec.arts.erotica (Tim), and
alt.folklore.(sub)urban, alt.fan.lemurs, comp.society.folklore, and the hijinx
mailing list (Joel). A miniFAQ on Tim, by Joel, is available. More fun to watch
than Abbott and Costello.
 Joel "flamed a proposed rmgrouping of alt.folklore.computers to ashes in
late 1992", and has his own alt.fan group, created by Serdar Argic in
retaliation for Joel's newgrouping of alt.fan.serdar-argic; he furiously
opposed the RFD on soc.sexuality.zoophilia for unstated reasons (possibly
having to do with his long-running war against alt.fan.furry or animal
characters in MUDs). Seems to have been affected rather for the worse by
winning the election for Kibo some time back (you know what they say about
absolute power...); the hijinx mailing list, for "getting out the vote" on one
side or another of controversial Big 7 proposals, came into existence shortly
after that, with him a major impetus. Recently created alt.folklore.suburban
(moderated) and took over the moderation of comp.society.folklore, in reaction
to the amount of "noise" on a.f.u and a.f.computers . Is putting out the
Serdar Argic Howling Through The Wires T-shirt (deadline June 7th 1994, sorry),
as well as the Joel Furr "WILL CREATE NEWSGROUPS FOR FOOD" mousepad and
possibly the C&S Green Cards And Spam T-shirt. Is a major force behind
alt.fan.lemurs, and apparently has a pet lemur Nigel and does good works for a
Primate Research Center near him.
 Tim, on the other hand, has a style that grows on one, and has basically
simply said each objection to new alt-group proposals so *many* times (because
there's so *many* people that drop in saying, for example, "I want
alt.fan.shostakovich!!") that many of them have been worn down to a simple
"No.". Tim *will* rmgroup your alt-group newgroup if it's not been mentioned
on alt.config; that's his right, as it is anyone's, and it does help to keep
alt somewhat non-totally-exponentially-growing...
 Proposed as the counterbalances on the us.* hierarchy's Cabal, along with
tale (q.v.) and four other less-extremely-namespace-opinionated people. Only
time would tell if this would keep them completely away from alt.config...
however, since the us.* proposal was shot down in flames, and discussion was
moved to us.config, a new us.* hierarchy (and their involvement in it) may
or may not ever actually emerge...
Post as [e-mail] (Tim Pierce) and [e-mail],
[e-mail], jkfurr@[snarf,*ip].eecs.umich.edu (Joel Furr).
There is no truth to the rumor that "Furrfu!" refers to Joel.

Uncle Fester (Kiss Me - I'm An ASSHOLE!):
 Father-figure to alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.d . Helps rein in the
flames on occasion; former poster of the Official Assholes of a.b.p.e List
(simply a periodic listing of those who have posted non-binary stuff to the
binary group in the last period of time in a format designed to get their
attention - he's first on every list, of course, because the List has to go
on a.b.p.e to be effective). Was famous for his posting prolificacy when he
first showed up on a.b.p.e; real name: Tim Hester. Has been lying low lately,
but can be seen on talk.bizarre. May be reinstating the List soon... but
maybe not from nyx, as his crusade against alt.sex.intergen (he believes
a group for discussing, among other things, pedophilia, deserves only
post-bombing) seemed to have temporarily shut nyx down... (they *said* it was
for "a planned University wide network outage (for maintenance)", which shows
the importance of timing...). Sadly, the Uncle Fester persona has been retired
lately, with Tim now posting under his real name... Posts as
[e-mail] (Tim Hester).

Brad Templeton (Is that a ... Dave *Barry* post I see?):
 ClariNet founder and owner. Creator and former moderator, for years, of
rec.humor.funny, back when it *was*. Some time back was engaged in
per^H^Hrosecution via news.admin.* of the binary erotica groups for massive
copyright violations; thinks it's every UseNetizen's duty to a) admonish the
poster of each and every copyright-violating post and b) notify the magazine
it's taken from... may have been exposed to Clarinet's policy meetings for a
bit too long, but this attitude is quite understandable, given that it's the
source of his income, and that nothing less than vigorous enforcement of
ClariNet's non-re-feeding/non-re-posting policies will even slow down the
flood of people wanting to re-broadcast syndicated news items and Dave Barry
columns on UseNet [Note: Dave Barry's column finally became a casualty at
Clarinet due to exactly this problem - the people that Brad buys it from
got one too many complaints about the rebroadcastings, even with all Brad's
work hunting them down, and cut off Brad's supply lines...]. Is *also* a
fervent supporter of free speech on UseNet (along with several others such as
Karl Denninger, each in their own separate way). Has been UseNetting since
1981... has played "devil's advocate" on news.admin.* against the large group
of people wanting to toss advertising entirely off of UseNet in the wake of
the Canter&Siegel spam. Tends to take Karl Denninger's side whenever the latter
starts up his "the a.b.p.e.* groups are full of copyright violations and
anyone who takes them is violating the laaaaaaw!" crusade, seen intermittently
on news.admin.misc and a.b.p.e.d ...
Contrib. post (actually, a .sig):
 Reposting a ClariNet article to any Usenet newsgroup is a violation of
copyright.  However, making fun of Brad Templeton is perfectly legal.
--
Posts as [e-mail] (Brad Templeton).

Don Black:
Contrib. posts:
 Someone nobody's mentioned is Don Black, who believed that Jews are
literally descended from the Serpent in the Garden of Eden.
--
 He was living in Alabama in the mid to late 80's. My girlfriend did a
telephone interview with him for a social studies project.
--
 He used to be on Prodigy, too. I think he was big in the Louisiana KKK.
Daniel "And he worked in the David Duke campaign" Case
--

Rikiya Asano ("You so funny"):
Contrib. posts:
 I'd like to nominate Rikiya Asano, who posts on talk.politics.guns,
soc.culture.japan, et al: "All Americans are violent racists!"  There is
much speculation that R.A. is a phony, i.e., not Japanese but just
pretending to be by using broken English, references to 'Nippon', etc.,
but the jury is still out. Talk.politics.guns attracts a lot of live
wires, especially those who believe that Clinton is a [leftist,
socialist, Marxist, Communist, Nazi, traitor] and is itching to turn the
U.S. into a Marxist state. Anyone playing "Spot the Net.Loony" should
check it out, but be aware that a little t.p.g. goes a long way.
--
 Also posts to soc.culture.asian.american too, about how he's such catnip
to the ladies. This came in especially useful during the flame war on
alt.config about alt.sex.fetish.oriental and its proposed successor,
alt.appreciation.asian. Rikiya there went into great detail about his
own sex life and masturbatory habits-I was quite surprised. Many people
think he's a poseur, though. But do these people post to other newsgroups,
too? It hardly surprises anyone that talk.politics.guns attracts a high
degree of loons.
--
 I used to wish Rikiya Asano was [an AI program], but unfortunately he has
turned out to be a real civil engineering master's student at CMU. I've come
across him twice.
--
 [Note that *many* of the talk.politics.* groups are hotbeds of flaming and
odd behavior; thus this isn't really grounds for FAQ inclusion unless the
behavior gets spread to other, ususally-quieter groups...]

Andrew Wiles (My proof is unfortunately far too large for this newsgroup):
Contrib. post:
 I would like to nominate as a quintessential non-net non-loon:
Andrew Wiles. (Marilyn [vos Savant], if you're out there, shaddup.)
Over in sci.math, one of Wiles's graduate students has had his
email response to a fan, answering some of the fan's questions,
posted by the fan. Here are three relevant extracts:
>First of all, I should let you know that he almost never reads his email,
>and does not read newsgroups at all. The only reason he posted
>to sci.math was because he felt he had to make some sort of
>announcement in light of all the recent rumors, and someone on
>the faculty helped to show him how to post to a newsgroup. ...
>Since Prof. Wiles has not even been keeping up with all the rumors
>surrounding the status of his proof (when I asked him about a few of
>them, he said that he had not heard of them at all!), instead spending
>his time on the proof itself, I don't think he has paid much attention
>to what Marilyn has to say. ...
>I suspect he probably doesn't even know who Ludwig Plutonium is! :)
 I suspect he probably doesn't even know who I am, either, even though
we were once co-guests-of-honor at a party a friend of mine threw....
--

N.O. Monaghan:
Contrib. post:
 Another one who occurred to me-N.O. Monaghan, seen in many of the same
groups as Jack Schmidling was, and a great fan of Fascism, the medieval
Catholic Church, and the British National Party.
--

John De Armond (I cheer every time a pig is killed):
Contrib. post:
 In that vein, I think John "I cheer every time a pig is killed" De
Armond would have to get some recognition, especially since he posts
to alt.law.enforcement.
--

AJ Teel (Sui Juris):
Contrib. posts:
 While we're at it: don't forget AJ Teel ("Sui Juris"), who is
convinced (and wants to convince all of us -- over and over again)
that the Uniform Commercial Code (section 1-207, to be precise) will
get you out of ANY traffic ticket.
--
 Is that the same guy who also posts to alt.conspiracy and alt.activism
about how a) you can avoid paying income tax by simply not sending in a
return, and b) how juries have the power to simply refuse to convict the
person despite overwhelming evidence of guilt as a form of civil
disobedience? And other legal gimmicks-although I think he stopped with
the jury nullification thing because he (or some respondent) crossposted
to misc.legal and someone there dug up laws from several states that state
law says that juries are *required* to convict guilty people?
--
 This needs commenting.  It is true that juries have that power. There is
no law that can force them to convict a person, if they don't wish to do so.
As far as the state laws - there are certainly some that "appear" to
require a jury to judge a person based only on the law.  However, they
do not prohibit a person from judging the law, and finding the person
innocent because the jury feels the law does not apply in that particular case.
--
 [and so on, and so on; there is intense debate on a sporadic basis over this
in misc.legal; the FAQ author is neither a lawyer nor willing to play one on
the net.]
Other contrib. post:
>Also, a hundred years ago people simply didn't trust paper money.
 Oh, go on, it can't have been *that* long since A.J. Teel left the net.
ObUL: Geo. Washington trusted silver as far as he could throw it.
Lee "faith, hope, and cherry tree" Rudolph
--
Can be found in (among other places) alt.conspiracy and alt.activism; has a
 .sig about fifteen lines long that must be seen to be believed. Posts as
[e-mail] (A. J. Teel, Sui Juris).

BJGW:
Contrib. post:
 Oh, my - how could I forget AFU's own personal contribution to the Loon
list - BGJW, the quintessential McGill poster, who nevertheless managed to
turn AFU into a BOT-war ravaged, large-killfile, bandwidth-wasting newscape
for several weeks. I don't think any loon has achieved more indirect
success and made so many people act so ridiculously than he has - not even
Serdar and Robert McE.
 Dan "and all because of a simple, stupid little programming error - but
that's a long story" Case
--
 But like Phil said about B1FF, BGJW is most likely a troller.  You're right
about the end results, however.  Here's a note I got from 'BGJW' himself:
Date:        Mon, 27 Sep 93 17:14:54 EDT
From: "E. K. Yersh" <[e-mail]>
Subject: RE: Re: Hi Everybody!
In article <27tsk6$[e-mail]> [e-mail]
>In article <[e-mail]> [e-mail]
>>In article <[e-mail]>,
>>>Hi Everybody!
>>Or do I have to throw it out because it's from McGill?
>I'm almost 100% convinced that McGill is the creation of a really old hat,
>there's no other way to get this consistent throughput of stupidity from
>one site for so long...
>ObULSpreaderoftheDay:  Lewis Grizzard.  He may be funny as hell some of the
>time, but he tells many. many ULs as true stories.
>--
>Jason R. Heimbaugh (CatStyle) [e-mail]
>Two (unnamed) people on campus debugging telnetd code:
>"Oh, I'm missing a colon."
>"So is my aunt."
 Jason, listen up. I'll let you in on a theory of mine.
 My theory is that all these clueless messages are written by the same guy.
I think that there's really only one guy at McGill who posts on AFU. What I
think he does is that when he discovers terminals which students have used
but not logged off from he posts a message from their account and purposely
makes the content idiotic thereby feeding the impression that McGill is an
institution for boneheads.  He likely gets a kick from the reactions to the
messages and from knowing that he's been able to decieve even that higher
strain of humanity that is active on AFU.
 Your Pal: BGJW
--

stx1606 (Come on, I can't HEEEEEEAR you!):
 Of alt.sex.bondage, talk.religion.misc, and alt.binaries.pictures.erotica;
went from group to group trying to fan flames. Asked for non-consentual
rape stories on alt.sex.bondage and then started to use the rape stories as
proof that ASBer were not tough on Rape. He tried to get talk.religion.misc
people involved in the fight. No one took the bait... He then proceeded to
revive the "let's get the queer pictures off a.b.p.e by splitting it"
flamewar for about two weeks. Quote: "I have been washed in the blood of
the lamb and that stain will never come off!" Unable to recognize satire
at .23 milimeters. Unable to buy a clue, unwilling to rent to own. Seems
to have decomposed. The alt.syntax.tactical crowd (not based in a newsgroup,
but who go from newsgroup to newsgroup trying to touch off massive flamewars)
seems to be stx1606's spiritual heirs...

hshen; hollystone s. (An artificial (dis)intelligence project):
Contrib. post:
 One more is a person who posts vindictive and semi-coherent articles in
some sci.* groups -- I've seen him/her most often in sci.math. The name
field has been "S. Hollywood", "S. H.", and "S."; the username has at
times been "hshen", I think. I can't remember the sitename -- some uni-
versity in the western US, I think. This person was active within the
past couple of months, but I haven't seen anything from him/her just
lately -- maybe I'm not reading the "right" groups.
--

Charles Packer:
Contrib. post:
 A person who comes across to me as a borderline crank is Charles Packer,
who posts occasionally in various groups where current events are being
discussed. His bugbear is errors, or things that he thinks are errors,
in newspaper articles or photo-captions. He is entirely coherent and
sometimes the things he thinks must be errors really are, so maybe he's
just researching a book or something rather than being a crank; but it
looks to me as if his skepticism level is set a good deal too high. Again,
I can't remember his posting site -- probably somewhere in the New York
area, since the newspaper he most often cites is -- see below.
 MARTIANS BUILD TWO IMMENSE CANALS IN TWO YEARS.
 Vast Engineering Works Accomplished in an Incredibly Short Time by Our
 Planetary Neighbors.            -- N.Y.Times headline, August 27, 1911
--

Ralph Taite (Walphie):
Contrib. post:
 What about Ralph(Walph/Waphie) Taite as a possible net.legend/loon??
He has completely taken over the likes of alt.feminism,soc.men,soc.women
and god knows what other groups..
Ah the hum of ^Walph is a Nazi^ , ^Walph rapes^ and similar subject
lines.. :)
--
> Is he the one (I think he was-he's a Texan) who believes women who have
>abortions should be drawn and quartered so they can understand how the fetus
>feels? No, wait-he believes that only women who have had more than one abortion
>should have that done (The rest should be executed normally).
In both cases, you're thinking of Ralph Taite at UT Austin, who was offering
firearms training for those who wanted to attack clinics, and who also made an
honorable run at net.loon status by urging people to write my admins and
demand that I be fired because I was using drugs (all this, of course, based
on some conveniently timed anonymous e-mail which has since conveniently been
forgotten by Ralph), but for some reason he never actually did so himself.
--
[Note that many people/loons crosspost incessantly between soc.men, soc.women,
and alt.feminism; beware crossposting to these groups, as it can (but not
necessarily will) touch off everlasting threads in your group fueled by
cross-posters from these groups...]

Richard Schennberg:
Contrib. post:
 Pesters the alt.magic, alt.pagan, and talk.religion.christian groups (among
others) with his stories of satanic infiltration into the church. He is
convinced that a secret cabal of Mormon Freemasons (!) ruined his military
career and destroyed his marriage. He's been laughed off alt.magick and
alt.pagan, but is still infesting src. Posts as <[e-mail]>.
--

Joe Buehler:
Contrib. post:
 Don't see him much lately. <enter paraphrase mode>
     * The Catholic church was OK up until Vatican 2: the changes
since then were heretical. Clearly, Mass in anything but Latin is
a not good with God. If the Pope says it, it must be true...
     * The Spanish Inquisition was a Good Idea, since there were real
heretics out there...
     * Masons steal Holy Water and Consecrated Wafers from Catholic churches
(I haven't the foggiest idea what we're supposed to do with them).
     <exit paraphrase mode>
--
 it would probably be inaccurate to have him
say 'anything the Pope says is true'.  Actually, in his view a number of
recent papal statements have been dangerously liberal.  I haven't seen
him about lately, though.
--

drieux (drieux, just drieux):
 recently sighted xposted to a.r.k and alt.usenet.kooks...
Contrib. post:
 He was sort of like McElwaine, only he parodied himself; he posted
wacked-out conspiracy rants accusing people of being part of the
GreatEvilSatanicOxygenCartelConspiracy or something to that effect. Is he
still existent?
--
 As a sometime correspondent of "drieux just drieux", I'd like to think
he was not a parody (much less an ex-parody).  A luminous and eccentric
writer, yes.  But I'd rather have him on my team than most.
--
 ummm... are you trying to imply that the
GreatSeXularHumanistHeteroSexualPlot&GeneralIkkyPooperness
is not real?  Next you'll be tryuing to tell me that
KableTV is not a conspiracy!
(I'm only paranoid because I know too much)
...
Castle Wetware's resident Philosopher and Sniper is still
'out there' in all senses of the word.
just don't get into dueling references with him.
He'll push your buttons just to watch you jump.
ps - it rhymes with true.
--
 drieux is a real person and he's easily reached--I just called the
NASA Ames operator and she put me through to his office.  He wasn't
there, though, because he works second shift.  Of course, this only
works if you know his real name.
--
 Drieux is still around. He used to do incredibly horrible things for the CIA,
and Curtis Yarvin (as in the day) claims to have met him.
--
 Haunts talk.bizarre ... Posts from drieux@{vladimir.}wetware.com (drieux, just
drieux).

Bob Webber:
 At one time, Bob Webber claimed to read (regularly) every news-article in
existence. Quite probably he no longer does this (simply because it's not
humanly possible and hasn't been for Some Time), but this does qualify him
for inclusion as a genuine net.legend... Has said that even up to just before
the Great Renaming he was still reading almost every newsgroup, though no
longer every article. Posted from (probably) @porthos.rutgers.edu .

John Covici:
 reposts Lyndon LaRouche stuff, coordinates the Larouche mailing list.
Contrib. post:
 Lyndon Larouche's mouthpiece on the net. Hard to tell what *he*
thinks (and I'm not sure I want to know), but keeps alt.activism up on
the latest ramblings of his mentor. These include (I'm not making this
up) a Zionist-KKK-Nazi-British-Mason-Apollonian conspiracy against
Western Civilization.
--
 He used to post LaRouchite propaganda from a site named
covici.com to some of the soc.culture groups.  He seemed to go off the air
about a year or so ago.  When alt.desert-storm was a going concern, he was
a frequent poster.  I, for one, do _not_ miss his rambling multi-hundred
line diatribes ...
--
John is still active on alt.activism (that bastion of rationality) where
he mostly posts Lyndon LaRouche's daily messages on an irregular basis.
He is also running a LaRouche mailing list, so that may be what is taking
up his time.
--
Last time I checked he was also quite prominent on talk.politics.soviet.
--
Posts as [e-mail] (John Covici).

Carasso (I'M NUMBER 2!):
 Roger David Carasso; reputedly the major popular artist of "xposted to
*.test". Claims to be "FOUNDER OF THE INTERNET"; alt.sex.carasso and
alt.sex.carasso.snuggles apparently existed at one time... Lives in L.A.,
reputedly married to BONNIE; GIFs are apparently available - ask him...
Contrib. post:
Very amusing on the net, dull as dust in real life.
--
REGARDING MYSELF, ROGER DAVID CARASSO, NET.GOD --
OTHER FACTS OF INTEREST:
- I've had 4 accounts at Berkeley disabled and closed.  3 account, 2 times.
- I've had 1 account at gypsy's friend's site closed.
- I've had 2 accounts at USC disabled and closed. 1 three times.
- I then cracked 50 accounts at USC, where all business majors in summer
  school are given the password "summer" and 80& don't bother to change it.
- I've had 2 accounts at Netcom disabled and closed.  One twice.
- I've had 1 the turing.org site taken down because the sysadmin liked
  me and refused to close my account.
- I've had my best friend lose his account at UCLA because of my posts
  from there.
- I've made it so MIT doesn't allow anonymous logins anymore, after a
  rash of my posts.
- I got a new account yesterday, and within 10 minutes root was taking
  to me asking if I was "*the* roger david carasso", and disabled my
  account.
- There are several others, but I can't remember.
--
 CARASSO:  Probable record-holder for most accounts suspended on
Usenet.  Had student account at USC suspended three times for "abuse
of Usenet".  Netcom suspended his account once, reenabled it, then
axed it.  Got a new Netcom account in name of then-girlfriend (now
wife) Bonnie Houck (who is believed by some to be fictitious), which
also got suspended.  When at [e-mail], trolled bait on various
groups under various aliases (most notably Rachel Dafni Christy
["Wherever you go, there you are, so PARTY!"], Bob D. Crane, and
Rajagopalan Dsomething-or Cother ["Be one with the Bhagavan" or
something like that]).  Rabid anti-Arab/Muslim, creator of
alt.wanted.muslim.gay (among others).  Now posting from inference.com,
his actual workplace; since he has to tone down or face the wrath of
his boss (who is monitoring him), his posts are now somewhat tepid and
bland.  May have been coiner of catchphrase "I SEE A GREAT NEED".
Still posts to talk.bizarre, where he is either loathed or reluctantly admired.
--
 Brief disclaimer: I *was* monitoring Roger, but it ended up costing us
too much in snapped-off electrodes and chewed-through leather restraints.
--
I, ROGER DAVID CARASSO, AM THE CREATOR OF THE FOLLOWING NEWSGROUPS. PRAISE ME.
alt.newbie
alt.newbies
alt.best.of.internet
alt.herve.villechaize.dead.dead.dead
alt.fan.roger.david.carasso
alt.politics.bush
alt.politics.clinton
alt.politics.perot
alt.politics.gooley
alt.fan.gooley
alt.job.gooley
alt.gobment.lones
alt.wanted.moslem.men
alt.wanted.moslem.women
alt.wanted.moslem.gay
alt.imploding.kibo
alt.aldus.freehand
alt.fractal-design.painter
alt.pixar.typestry
alt.fan.howard-sterm.fartman
alt.flame.marshal.perlman.weenie
alt.flame.hairy-douchebag.merrideth-tanner
There are others, but I can't remember them!
--
 [e-mail], [e-mail]
& [e-mail] all have personal archives of some of the best of
carasso, and probably the man himself does too
--
Posts as [e-mail] (d.r. carasso); this may change rapidly...

Max Borisoff, Larry Pearson, and alt.christnet (Christnet is *copyright*!):
 Well. Where to begin? Two weeks of slowly-becoming-less-clueless attempts to
create the alt.christnet hierarchy, first by Max, and then by Larry (apparently
Max's sysadmin, and equally clueless to start with); several posts to
alt.config (while ignoring email); a sudden insight, followed by *twelve*
a.c.* newgroups; dawning realization that people from Outside Christnet.Org
(located, apparently, in L.A.) were Posting In The Christnet.Org Newsgroups;
attempts to make the groups moderated; vague legal threats; flame and
counterflame (on alt.config *and* the alt.christnet.* groups, which had been
swooped upon with great glee by several people who thunk: "Aha! A place to
confront fundies!", Keith Cochran (q.v.) amongst them; the sudden appearance of
Hansel Lee, and his equally quick disappearance when he a) made a threat while
posting from his military computer and b) forgot there might be superiors
lurking on alt.config; the final partial realization of the vastm^Hness that is
Usenet by Max; and the creation (still slightly cluelessly) of the christnet.*
hierarchy, and subsequent partially-successful rmgrouping of the alt.christnet
hierarchy. All in all, about a month of More Fun Than Alt.Config Is Allowed
To Be, and as good a Bad Example of Unbridled Altgroup Creation as we're
ever likely to see... Post as [e-mail] and
[e-mail] .

Stephen Eisenberg:
Contrib. post:
 recently nominated as a net.idiot on can.general and known for
his knee-jerk support of the Canadian government in the Teale/Homolka
trial ban AND his tendency to hysterically flame anyone who says anything
in the slightest bit negative about Canada or positive about the US
(especially in comparison to Canada). AFUers may remember him for his
"Photographer For Hire!" sig and the fact that he had absolutely no sense
of humor during that whole debate on Canada's lower rate of firearm death
vs. the US. And the fact that he's from McGill and definitely *not* under the
control of BGJW.
--

Stephen Grossman (The Paranoid Randroid):
 Has "recently" been haunting the usual alt. group suspects (.activism,
.conspiracy, etc.).
Contrib. post:
 I've never corresponded with Stephen Grossman, but I've been in the same
room with him several times, and we worked on the same copy desk at
different eras; he occasionally writes letters to the editor which are
by no means identical to his net.postings -- if he makes it past the
nomination process, I could forward "fair use" quotations from a few of
those, maybe.
--

Scott Tai:
Contrib. post:
 I have followed *way too many* of these net.loon postings, and
I am finding it difficult to believe that no one has nominated Scott Tai.
Mr. Tai posts regularly to rec.org.mensa and to a variety of sci.*
newsgroups, using various accounts (some real, some not) and names
(including his latest, Sister Amy Tai, Instructor, St. Ann's Academy).
The primary purpose of his posts seems to be to argue with himself,
although agreeing with himself comes in a close second.
--

Michael Courtney:
Contrib. post:
>Does anyone have any of his legendary bits of wierdness from alt.atheism?
>His ramblings on The Queen of Heaven or even some of his (gasp!) poetry
>would be amusing. Or even the posts wherein he identified himself as God's
>Own Prophet(tm). I never bothered to save any of them, alas...
 I forgot to save that stuff, but I can certainly testify to the
existence of those posts.  When he first did the poetry, I asked him
in email why he was doing it, and his response was that he was attempting
to "get through to the people on alt.atheism".  His poetry was really
poor though, I rarely see worse stuff on rec.arts.poems.  You can
get his masterpiece paper via anonymous ftp.  I think it is on his
site at MIT.  :)  A few people even read it and it makes many of his
posts seem mild.
--
 As requested, here's a small sample of Michael Courtney's
posts to alt.atheism. Unfortunately, I don't have any of
his poetry, though perhaps someone else might.
 In fairness to Michael, he's definitely NOT a kook in
the sense of a Ludwig Plutonium. I think everyone on
a.a who remembers his first few posts would have to
agree that he genuinely seemed reasonable. He was
almost always pretty polite and cooperative, though
he'd occasionally dodge really uncomfortable challenges
to his fundamentalism. Understandable, I suppose, if
you ignore that the forum was a.a. Regardless, I
would have to say that Michael's credibility took a
serious nosedive after this post:
----begin quoted text----
>From [e-mail] Thu Jan 13 11:16:15 1994
Date: 15 Oct 1993 19:50:08 GMT
From: Michael Courtney <[e-mail]>
Newsgroups: alt.atheism
Subject: abortion and prophec

[e-mail] (Dan Yergeau) writes:
>[e-mail] (Michael Courtney) writes:
[deletions]
>Please quote the verse where God calls it murder.  Your personal
>relationship with God and your private revelations from God are not
>admissible.  Don't put words into your god's mouth.  I don't think he
>would appreciate it.
 I have God's permission to call abortion murder.  I am a
prophet sent by God to declare the destruction of the United  States
because of abortion.
[more deletions; Michael provides some biblical basis for
his anti-abortion stance.]
 If either God did not exist, or abortion was not murder, God would not
be planning to bring the retribution on the United States  that he is
now planning.  Let me be specific in this prophecy.  This is what the Lord
has said:
 Within 40 years the following things will happen:
 1. The United States will cease to be governed as set forth in the
Constitution.  The United States will also cease to enjoy the freedom
it declared for itself in the Declaration of Independence.
 2.  The blood of our young men will be poured out into th  streets,
for the Lord is a God of retribution.  Millions of Americans will die
on American soil in fulfillment of the Scriptures:
 If a man sheds blood, by man shall his blood be shed.
and,
 Atonement cannot be made for land on which blood has been shed,
except by the blood of the one who shed it.
 3. A dragon will rip open the pregnant women of the United States.
 4. This prophecy is unconditional.  No repentance can stop it.  Nothing
can stop what God has decided to do.
 God is not mocked, we will reap what we have sown.
 That's all of the prophecy, but I will add that if you are still alive
when it happens there is still forgiveness for your sins through Jesus Christ.
--
Michael Courtney    |Reply by email if you really want an answer to a question
[e-mail] |about something in this post.  I do consider flames,
                    |mocking or obscenity to be indications that you are not
                    |asking honest questions. P.S. I have the FAQ's.
----end quoted text----
 Understandably, many on a.a were a bit skeptical that the
Christian God would intervene as described above.
--
Posts as [e-mail] (Michael Courtney).

Captain Sarcastic (Oh how lovely):
Contrib. post:
>From: [e-mail] (Captain Sarcastic)
>No, I am most definately not joking.
>I plan on transcending Kibo in net.awareness, and this is but the
>first step in my campaign.
 To do this, all he needs is a heart, a spleen, and a brain..
and a spelling-checker.
>Power corrupts, but absolute power is kinda neat.
 "Captain Sarcastic" must be another of the net.AIs - what human being
would be caught posting "Captain Sarcastic" crap?  Mr. Ediger, please
add "Captain Sarcastic" to the net.nuts list, with 'delusions of grandeur'
as the diagnosis.
--
 Update: he's now got 12 regular posters to alt.captain.sarcastic, and
is gaining fast on Kibo's 29,000 ... and is optimistic... He's also claimed
that the "$2 bill almost thought to be intrinsically counterfeit at Taco Bell"
story happened to him, on several occasions.
 Update update (7/94): up to 190 posts/month, beating out fnet.general and
alt.fan.enya ...
Posts as [e-mail] (Captain Sarcastic).

Monica (Net.goddess):
Contrib. post:
 Maybe I'm late with this one, but how about Monica, the
Korean girl who was on the net one year, created a big
following, then went home to enter a nunnery, never to
see the Internet again.  Any data?
--
 Check out the FAQ in alt.religion.monica. Note that although
Monica herself is treated as a saint by her following (she
may well be), the group is almost entirely Korean.  But, if
we're going to worry about offending someone, we'd might as well
not have the list at all, right?
--
A minifaq on Monica is available.

Anthony Lest & Nabeel A. Rana
 (Rana is Rana, and Lest is Lest, and Lest is not Rana.):
Contrib. post:
>Then there's Anthony Lest, who took a massively controversial vote and
>yet never existed - "Rana is Rana, and Lest is Lest, and Lest is not
>Rana." (which was apparently the soc.religion(.islam).ahmadiyya(h) vote,
>which is due up again anytime now)...
 Rana definitely deserves a mention. After massive flaming and vote
fraud on "soc.religion.islam.ahmadiyya", he said a "friend" of his
would take the vote. After the vote, people began complaining that
their no votes weren't counted. Lest seemed to disappear, and turned
out never to have existed! Even better, they found out that Lest
always seemed to be logged in at the same time, and from the same
machine, as Rana.
--
 Rana is still around, and recently asked on alt.config about how to send
a newgroup message... posts from [e-mail] (Nabeel A. Rana).

IdEAL Order Psychic TV (clever satire):
 A, um, piece of experimental satire by Jeff Harrington and Elsie Russell.
See the minifaq for extreme details...

SN Mozumder (WHY ATHEISM SUPPORTS CHILD MOLESTING):
Contrib. post:
 But my real vote goes to Bobby Mozumder, one who
was far more persistent than Michael Courtney (q.v.) on alt.atheism, and
came up with a bunch of real gems. Many people even grabbed stuff of his for
sig material.
--
 He is the author of the theory that no true follower (tm) of
Islam can ever do any evil.  He came up with the theory of
temporary atheism to explain away problems presented.
Famous for quoting entire articles to add a few lines
(like another kook famous to alt.atheism, Bill Conner),
he tends to flee for a few months only to come back and
cause the traffic to double on the religious newsgroups
he frequents.  Also famous for the famous line that
atheism causes child prostitution in Tibet, as
well as the idea that all atheists are evil.  bobbe@vice.???.edu?
Got himself a second account when too many people learned
how to put him in a kill file.  Always uses S. N. Mozumder as
the real name (as far as I've seen).  Common nicknames
include Blooby, B.M.  Currently has left alt.atheism for
(he claims) other religious newsgroups, but I have
not seen any reports of him.
--
 Not quite. Booby is the _usual_ nickname for Mozumder, but I decided to come
up with "Blobby" the first time I flamed him on a.a.
 I can understand the reference to the dreaded Bill Conner, but I didn't notice
much of anything concerning the equally deserving Michael Coutney. Hmmm...
Don't forget his infamous "Atheism is what I say it is and you're an evil
atheist especially if you call me on it" rag.
--
 S.N. "Bobby" Mozumder, Islamic proselytizer to alt.atheism.
Noteworthy for his complete inability to listen to what anybody said.
Posted articles with titles like "WHY ATHEISM SUPPORTS CHILD
MOLESTING".  Typical quotes from my file:
"Still, you have to be brainwashed by atheism to think you have morals."
"It is purely a mental problem that can be corrected when Islam is applied."
--
Posted as [e-mail] (Bobby Mozumder).

The High:
Contrib. post:
 The High was three brothers who came on the net in October ['93] and started
posting their bizarre conviction that Marvel and DC comics were to merge
("The papers are signed!") to alt.comics.superman, rec.arts.comics.misc
and rec.arts.comics.xbooks.  We're 95% certain that was bait, but...
The High also get marks for forging return paths, flaming anyone who
tried to suggest that a major reorganisation of the comics industry
might *just* have been in the trade press, and for setting follow-ups
to alt.desert.toppings, alt.fan.ketchup and other non-existent news groups.
They signed all their messages "Love and oodles, The High."  Towards the
end of their career, they stated trying to clog up racm with one-line
posts about Casper the Friendly Ghost.
 They were so hated by the rest of the newsgroup that they got kicked off
the net within one month of getting on, after an avalanche of complaints
went to their postmaster. For now, the High are dormant, but apparently
they're getting their net access back in the spring [of '94].
 There was also a guy calling himself The High II who claimed kicking the
High off was censorship, and started posting apparently serious messages
in the High's style as a tribute, but he gave up after a couple of weeks
when he realised nobody was flaming him.
 (BTW, the High is *not* the same person as racm regular Matthew High.)
Just thought he might qualify, for one of the shortest and most
incendiary net careers, if nothing else.
--

"Mark Ethan Smith" (Don't call me "miss"):
Contrib. post: [edited for pronouns]
 Hung out (no pun intended) in soc.women back in 1987-88. Passionately
believed that society was a man's world and that women were treated
as hopeless inferiors. Responded to all male posters by feminizing
their names in the hopes that they would feel the shame that the
English language imposes on women by having gender-specific words.
Was particularly fond of the word "diminutive." (All female-specific
words were diminutives.) Changed his name, reported from Susan, to
MES in hopes that men would see the typically-male name, assume that
he was a man and therefore not patronize him as an inferior woman.
Insisted upon using only men's restrooms. Seemed to have tremendous
inferiority complex on account of being born female. May have been
involved in the comp.women debate.
--
 I vaguely remember "Mr. Smith".  He posted to soc.feminism/soc.women
(possibly to some ancestor of these newsgroups as well).  The story was that
despite having two "X" chromosomes; he preferred to be called "mister" and in
all other ways to be treated as a man.  May have had his name legally
changed to "Mark" (from whatever it was originally).  He also claimed to
have worked for one of the armed services(?) and had gotten them to legally
treat him as a man rather then a woman.  I haven't seen any postings from
him in years, but then again I haven't regularly read any of the soc.*
groups in years either.  I don't think he is/was as 'unusual' as many more
recent legends; but probably deserves a mention.  Perhaps USENET was just a
quieter place in those days...
--
 "Mark Smith" was an annoyance outside Usenet as well; "he" (as the individual
insisted on being referred to) or "it" (as we liked to refer to the individual)
was an unwelcome visitor to a public-access Unix system called M-Net, in
Ann Arbor, during 1986 and 1987.  Smith said all of the wonderful things
other posters have mentioned, and used the loginid "reason" -- the same login
"it" apparently used on the Well.
 I vaguely recall that Smith harassed one M-Net user by mail and, perhaps,
voice phone to some extent.
--
 Other than this "quirk" of Mr. Smith's, I also remember him to have an
itchy 'f'-finger as well as the requisite desire to post massive flames.
Additionally, I have vague recollections of a) threatened lawsuits and
b) accusations of conspiracy.
In general, most of the colorful net.personalities of 1986-1988 no longer
seem to be with us, or at least keep a much lower profile.
--
 Ah, Mark Ethan Smith! Now we're talking net.legend.
 Back in 1989 when alt.flame was newborn, and only had a fifth of the traffic
it has now, a certain Mark Ethan Smith entered the scene, and flamed absolutely
everyone. This spread to almost every newsgroup imaginable, and rumour has it
that "Mark E Smith" had up to 50 flamewars going -at once. The poster turned
out to be female, and her access was revoked because she was violating the fair
use policy... Strangely, some months later "Mark Smith" resurfaced in alt.flame
and talk.bizarre, and people feared for another round.  Luckily, this was an
altogether more pleasant Mark Smith, completely unrelated to the legendary
spewer. This "new" Mark Smith wrote some very entertaining flames until mid
1992. But all this is legend, like Gene Spafford, Kent Paul Dolan, Patricia
O Tuama (Trish) etc.
--
>On the other hand, I guess I'm as glad as anyone that she's not a regular.
>Does anyone know what became of her?  (I ask, peeking through my fingers
>in case it turns out I'd really rather not know).
 The last I heard, which had to have been at least a year ago and
probably more like two, was that she was working in a copy shop in
Berkeley and seemed to be very happy and competent.  I retain a vague
memory that she was managing the shop, but am not entirely sure that
this is correct.
--
Posted as era1987@*.berkeley.edu (Mark Ethan Smith).

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