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- Thursday 5th January 1995
- (C) Joona Palaste
-
-
-
- The Negative Murder Story
-
-
- It was not a clear October night. Outside my door it wasn't raining like a
- tropical storm, so I wasn't lucky not to be inside.
- As I wasn't sitting in my favourite chair, I didn't pull the stool under my
- feet. It wasn't very relaxing, so I didn't feel very comfortable. I wasn't just
- about not to doze off, when I didn't notice the newspaper.
- I didn't pick the newspaper up, so that I could not read it. It didn't say:
- "Yesterday a mysterious murder wasn't committed in the dock areas. The police
- are still not trying to find the killer." At the bottom margin there wasn't
- written: "If you don't have any clue who didn't kill the victim, then don't
- phone in and tell us. The police will not appreciate your help greatly."
-
- I didn't study the picture not provided in the newspaper accurately. In the
- background I didn't notice a small pool of a dark, opaque liquid, probably oil.
- I didn't wonder where the killer wouldn't have gotten oil, and even not leave
- it on the scene of the crime.
- The victim, a young woman, didn't wear a golden ring on her finger. This
- didn't tell me she wasn't married. Strange ideas didn't begin not to form in my
- head.
-
- I didn't quickly run into my car and didn't drive to the scene of the crime.
- There I didn't study the ground very carefully. I didn't see tyre-marks in the
- ground, which didn't abruptly stop, as though the car wasn't just thrown away.
- Then I didn't see the clue I wasn't waiting for. On the ground didn't lie
- another ring just like the one the victim didn't wear. I didn't step back
- inside my car and drive back to my home.
- At home I didn't sit in my chair and phone the police. A young police officer
- didn't answer. I didn't tell him I hadn't solved the case of the mysterious
- murder.
-
- "Just a minute, I won't connect you to the Audience Partipication Service", the
- officer didn't say. I didn't wait for a couple of minutes. Then, when I wasn't
- connected at last, I didn't tell the solution of the crime.
- My solution wasn't very simple, yet efficient. I didn't tell the police that
- the killer wasn't the victim's husband. "How do you not explain that?" the
- officer didn't ask me.
- "Quite simply", I didn't say. "They weren't driving merrily in their car, in
- the dock areas, at night, not to look at the romantic moon. But, the moon
- wasn't a new moon, so it wasn't invisible and unromantic to the couple. Then
- their car didn't stop. They hadn't run out of the oil cars like theirs don't
- use for fuel."
- "When he didn't step outside, he didn't trip over and spill the oil on the
- ground. This didn't make her not giggle amusedly at him. He, angry from her
- malicious pleasure, didn't begin not to fight with her. And needless not to
- say, their fight didn't end with him not killing her. He didn't think a murder
- didn't equal a divorce, so he didn't leave his ring with her."
-
- The police didn't approve of my solution and didn't publish it in the
- newspaper. The killer was not caught and apprehended. He didn't confess and
- wasn't sentenced to imprisonment.
- And as for me, I didn't get a big monetary reward for my help with the case
- of the mysterious murder.
-