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Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 --------------------------------------------------------- | | | | | International Adult Weekly | | | | Edited by The Ambassador | | | | Published at 00:05(GMT) Every Saturday | | | | Requestable as ADULTNEWS from 2:254/12 | | | | | --------------------------------------------------------- This publication is placed into the public domain by the Publishers. Due to the nature of the material contained within this publication is not suitble for those under the age of 18. ***************************************************************** T A B L E O F C O N T E N T S 1. EDITORIALS Introduction to UK Smut News ............................ 1 2. ARTICLES & STORIES INTERESTING VIDEOS VIA STRANGE BREW! .................... 2 Why are the Cucumbers....... (this is for the ladies) .. 3 THE OFFICE PARTY ........................................ 6 3. System List's and Anouncements Particpating systems ................................... 8 International Smut Page i Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 ***************************************************************** E D I T O R I A L S ***************************************************************** The Ambassador London Embassy 2:254/12 What is Smut News? What is this all about then you must be asking! well this is an attempt to expand the idea of the smut conference that were started to allow fre discussion between all Adult users. As a request for users to stop placing long stories on the echo therefore I have created this publication to cater for all those stories and Smut Echo news. This Publication is to be made availble to all users who have access to adult areas. Please submit all articles by 6pm on fridays to me on 2:254/12 all articles should be in the following format:- Plain Ascii Maximum Line length 65 characters If you wish to have a mention in the contents page then the first line of the articles should be started with a '*' ie: * Your article description here If your contribution is an article or story then attach the Extentsion .ART if your contribution is an editorial like this then attach the extention .ED So please send us some text! Ambassador Editior International Smut Page 1 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 ***************************************************************** A R T I C L E S & S T O R I E S ***************************************************************** SMUTTY VIDEOS ============= The following videos have been mentioned in local messages on The Strange Brew! and could be available for exchange. If you would like to contact the owners of these videos to arrange a swap you should leave a message addressed to ALL in the local smutty message area on The Brew! with details of the video(s) you want/have and I am sure that someone will be in touch with you fairly quickly. <GRIN> Little girls blue set in us highschool.. lots of american 90 mins school uniforns and schoolgirl fantasy Co-ed fever set in an american university, american 85 mins good close-up action, quite complex PLOT! Erotic Fantasies 3 girls leave the city to start German 100 mins a country "sex farm", lots of horny german action Seven deadly sins 2 girls and 2 guys teach an German 100 mins "innocent" young girl about sex techniques. Lots of F/F, dildo and anal Gee there Big Lots of big titted girls with American 60 mins cocks in every orifice! Heavy Mamas More big tit action. Mainly American 60 mins black girls. OK in the end All M/F anal action. American 60 mins Bondage Classics 3 Collection of classic bondage shorts from H.O.M. Tourist Trap Part II V Good Bondage movie from H.O.M. The Unfaithful wife Mild S & M, Spanking, Anal sex, Rubber Dildoes etc. Bizzare Punishments Heavy S & M. NOT FOR THE FAINTHEARTED. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!. Well this what we've got on the STRANGE BREW! , what have you got to offer? THE STRANGE BREW! BBS |Yer Mother Wouldn't Like It|01-688-5756 International Smut Page 2 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 CUCUMBERS ARE BETTER THAN MEN BECAUSE....... ********************************************* The average cucumber is at least six inches long. Cucumbers stay hard for a week. A cucumber won't tell you size don't count. Cucumbers don't get TOO excited. A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety. Cucumbers are easy to pick up. You can fondle cucumbers in a supermarket... and you know how firm it is before you take it home. Cucumbers can get away any weekend. With a cucumber you can get a single room and you won't have to check in as 'Mrs. Cucumber'. A cucumber will always respect you in the morning. You can go to the movie with a cucumber and see the movie. At a drive in you can stay in the front seat. A cucumber can always wait until you get home. A cucumber won't eat all the popcorn. A cucumber won't drag you out to a John Wayne Film Festival. A cucumber won't ask: 'Am I first?' Cucumbers don't care if you're a virgin. Cucumbers won't tell other cucumbers you're a virgin. Cucumbers won't tell anyone you're not a virgin. With cucumbers, you don't have to be a virgin more than once. Cucumbers won't write your name and number on men's room wall. Cucumbers don't have sex hang-ups. Cucumbers won't ask: 'Am i the best' 'How was it?' 'Did you come?' 'How many times?' Cucumbers aren't jealous of your gynecologist, ski instructer or hair dresser. International Smut Page 3 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 Cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one. A cucumber will never make a scene because there are other cucumbers in the refrigerator. A cucumber won't mind hiding in the refrigerator when your mother comes over. No matter how old you are you can always get a fresh cucumber. Cucumbers can handle rejection. A cucumber won't pout if you have a headache. A cucumber won't care what time of the month it is. A cucumber never wants to get it on when your nails are wet. A cucumber won't give it up for lent. With a cucumber, you never have to say your sorry. Cucumbers won't leave whisker burns, fall asleep on your chest or drool on the pillow. A cucumber will never give you a hickey. Cucumbers can stay up ALL night and you won't have to sleep in the wet spot. A cucumber won't work your crossword in ink. A cucumber isn't allergic to your cat. Cucumbers never answer your phone or borrow your car. A cucumber won't eat all your food or drink all your liquor. A cucumber doesn't turn your bathroom into a library. Cucumbers won't go through your medicine chest. A cucumber doesn't use your toothbrush, roll-on, or hairspray. Cucumbers won't leave dirty shorts on the floor. A cucumber never forgets to flush the toilet. A cucumber doesn't flush the toilet while you're in the shower. With a cucumber, the toilet seat is always the way you left it. Cucumbers don't compare you to a centerfold. Cucumbers won't tell you they liked you better with long hair. A cucumber will never leave you for another man, another woman or another cucumber. International Smut Page 4 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 You will always know where your cucumber has been. A cucumber never has to call 'the wife'. Cucumbers won't tell you a vasectomy will ruin it for them. You can have as many cucumbers as you can handle. You only eat cucumbers when YOU feel like it. You don't have to wait for halftime to talk to your cucumber. A cucumber won't leave town on New Years Eve. Cucumbers never want to take you home to mom. Cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers. It's easy to drop a cucumber. A cucumber will never contest a divorce, demand a property settlement or seek custody of anything. **************************************************** International Smut Page 5 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 . I'd been trying to get into Genevieve's knickers ever since I'd interviewed her for the job. She was from Mauritius, 18, 6ft tall and thin as a beanpole except for her tits which were ENORMOUS! I'd taken her out for drinks several times and even bought her a delicious meal one night but I'd got absolutely nowhere so I was getting a bit pissed off by the time the office Christmas party came round. Everybody had been to the pub at lunchtime so we were all pretty merry by the time the party started at 5o'clock. One would have thought that prohibition was starting tomorrow by the way we all enthusiastically got stuck unto the booze. Most of the girls were into the champagne and the fellas were amply catered for with three barrels of real ale - one of which was Theakston's Old Peculiar. Genevieve, being a bit of a tomboy, joined the lads with pint of Old Peculiar - no-one thought to tell her how strong it was!! There was a traditional cold buffet served by a couple of very tasty uniformed waitresses - bets were being taken on whether they were wearing stockings and suspenders or tights (I never did discover the answer to that!). Included with the buffet were some jumbo sausages and out of the corner of my eye I noticed Genevieve selecting the biggest one she could find. I moved casually over to her side just as her l uscious lips encircled the end of the sausage and asked her if she had ever had anything so big in her mouth before (the Old Peculiar was getting to me by now). She turned to me, winked at me and walked away towards the office set aside for the blue movies (we did work for an ad agency). I followed her into the crowded office and stood behind her as she watched the video - Deep Throat wouldn't you know! The bird on the film was getting a real mouthful of a monster prick and looking as if she was really enjoying her job. I moved closer to Genevieve and asked quietly asked her if she had ever had one that size. 'Not yet' she replied and moved backwards rubbing her bum against my now hardening prick. I put one hand on her hip and pulled her closer to me and started grinding my prick against her so that she was in no doubt what I'd got. The office was dark so I moved my other hand up to her tit and discovered to my pleasant surprise that she wasn't wering a bra. I caressed her nipple which was already becoming aroused - she responded by putting one hand behind her back and grabbing hold of my now fully erect prick. She stroked it gently and leant her head back - I whispered to her that we might be a bit more comfortable in my deserted office two floors below. She turned and brought her lips to mine and squashed her full tits against my chest. Our lips parted as we each worked our body against the other. I broke away and took her hand and led her through the dance-floor towards the stairs. On reaching the landing she said that she wanted to go to my boss's office rather than mine - well mustn't disagree with a lady I thought so we headed up the stairs to his office. (He had already gone home so I knew we wouldn't be interrupted.) The office was about four times the size of mine with a large, comfortable leather sofa and a desk the size of a football pitch. As I followed her in I pulled down the zip at the back of her dress. I shut the door and as I turned she shrugged off the dress exposing those beautiful tits, which I had wanted to have for so long, and a very small pair of white International Smut Page 6 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 panties. I took hold of both tits and bent my head down to suck her outstanding nipples - moving from on to the other in quick suckcession - until they stood out about an inch. I reluctantly took one hand away and moved it down to her knickers which I discoverd were quite wet - she was obviously as excited as I was I pushed my hand down inside and felt the sparse covering of pubic hair, my long index finger slipped easily inside her juicy pussy. My thumb found her clitoris and she squirmed with delight and pulled my head hard to her tit. Two more fingers found there way into her fleshy wetness and her hips began to move, pushing her pussy harder onto my nimble fingers. She pulled my head up and forced her mouth against mine at the same time she pulled up my sweatshirt so that her nipples were pressed firmly against my hairy chest. Her finger nails were digging into my now bare back as she moaned quietly in delight. I could feel her juices running out of her gaping pussy as she neared her orgasm. Her thighs gripped my hand tighter and tighter as she pushed herself at me. 'Faster, harder.' she gasped breathlessly. She shuddered as she came again and again and slumped back against the desk. I slipped my fingers out of her soaking hole and finished removing my sweatshirt. My belt and zip were undone by eager hands, I hurriedly pulled off my shoes and jeans. Genevieve pushed me back against the desk and dropped to her knees. 'Now for your Christmas present!' she said as she looked up at me. She deftly pulled down my briefs to expose my throbbing prick. One hand gently fondled my aching balls whilst the other encircled my biggest asset. Her lips caressed it's length and lingered over the circumcised tip which was glistening slightly in the moonlight. Her tongue played around the rim and then her mouth sank gently down in answer to my letter to Santa. My hands guided her head slowly up and down my shaft. Her hand was working briskly along it's length as her lips and tongue were dancing around my knob. My hips began thrusting, fucking her mouth, I could feel the cum just waiting to burst out into her waiting mouth. Genevieve must have felt my urgency too because her fingers encircled the base of my cock and squeezed hard, the feeling subsided. Her hands moved to my buttocks and she took into her mouth as much of my prick as she possible could as she pulled me to her. The feeling of pleasure was fantastic, almost painful as I sensed that nothing was going to stop me cumming this time. 'Between your tits, Genevieve,' I yelled 'not in your mouth.' My prick slapped against my belly as she removed that gorgeous mouth of hers. Her ample tits enveloped my cock, the nob poking out, I took hold of her tits and began to fuck them desperately. I felt a tension in my buttocks and balls. Huge dollops of spunk flew on to her olive-tinted chest. I kept thrusting and squuezed her tits titghtly around my prick until I was empty. The white spunk dribbled down her chest, she wiped some up on her fingers which she then proceded to suck. 'I'm not letting that go to waste.'she said with a grin. At this point a loud cheer went up, there was a round of applause. Those bastards from the Creative Department had been watching through the window in the door!!! PINTCRUSHER 2.1.89 The STRANGE BREW! bbs, London, 01-688-5756, v22 & v22bis International Smut Page 7 Volume 1, Number 0 March 4, 1989 ***************************************************************** S y s t e m L i s t ' s a n d A n o u n c e m e n t s ***************************************************************** This is a current list of participating systems around the world. System Location Phone number Node No. ========= ========== ============== ========= The London Embassy London,UK 01-366-1778 2:254/12 The Strange Brew! Croydon,UK 01-688-5756 2:254 /19 The Connection London,UK 01-978-8540 2:254/2 The Penguin Yorkshire,UK 0943-830820 2:258/43 Frix Reading,UK 0734-420229 2:253/112 White Lightning Reading,UK 0635-37259 2:257/9 Komputer Knowledge Kings Risbro' 0844-274065 2:257/19 UK BBS09 QuickBBS HST Portsmouth,UK 0705-736025 2:251/11 No Place Like Home University 301-454-0360 1:109/506 Park, MD USA Falcons Rock University 301-217-9058 1:109/501 Park, MD USA The Dungeon Sunnyvale,CA USA 408-992-0846 1:143/40 Any Systems wishing to join the Echo's Please Contact the System nearest you for details to link in. International Smut Page 8