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- @BEGIN_FILE_ID.DIZ
- *****************
- Ok - I know, it's about fucking time.
- Here's part three. Got my dope, got my
- angel food cake, and I got my smokes...
-
- I'm happy.
- ******************@END_FILE_ID.DIZ
-
-
-
-
-
-
- Ross was, at best, at his all time low. He sulked around his
- apartment. He looked at the skull he had finally managed to retrieve
- from Carol's apartment. He looked at Marcel.
-
- "You don't have to worry. Every time you turn around, there's
- someone wanting to rub you somewhere. It must be that huge phallic tail
- of yours..that has to be it."
-
- There was a knock on the door.
-
- "Ross, you home?", the voice called out. It was Janice.
-
- "Dear God, what is she doing here?", he whispered. Not wanting to
- seem rude, he opened the door.
-
- "Hello, Janice", he eeked out, noticing that her open trenchcoat
- revealed that she was wearing nothing underneath.
-
- "Ross, I'm going to be straight with you. Through all the cruelty
- that Chandler has heaped atop my shoulders you were always the one who
- was kind to me. You never said a harsh thing to me or about me. Ross -
- I love you."
-
- Ross stood agape. His first instinct was to aim for a window
- and jump, but then it dawned on him that this was his opportunity to
- fuck up Chandler's mind as badly as Chandler had fucked his up. He pulled
- Janice over to him, and kissed her on the mouth. He pulled off her trenchcoat
- and laid her down on the floor.
-
- "Oh, Ross....I never knew you had it in you..", she moaned.
-
- "It's not me it's going to be in, Janice", he huffed, completely
- overcome by the need to break out of his sexual frustration.
-
- His lips wrapped around her nipple, gently sucking on it, making
- it hard in his mouth. "Oh, Ross", she moaned, as his hands worked their
- way down into her crotch. "It *has* been a long time, hasn't it?"
-
- Deciding to help him get some control over himself, she unfastened
- his pants and pulled out the Schwimmer Trunk. She slid it into her, and
- waited through the whole thirty seconds of panting and groaning until he
- came.
-
- "Gosh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to be so quick.", he mumbled.
- "It's just been so long since the last time Carol and I-"
-
- "Shhh....don't worry. Now that that's out of the way we can take our
- time.", she said, with a *huge* smile on her face.
-
- She took the rest of his clothing off, and pulled him by his rapidly
- waning penis to his bedroom. She laid back on the bed, and waited for Ross
- to make her feel the way Chandler never could.
-
- He gently started kissing her neck, her face, her ears, her shoulders.
- His hands roamed over her body, caressing, fondling, massaging. He used his
- tongue to draw pictures on her chest, concentric circles around her areloae
- (Fuck, I can't even spell that sober....), his fingers sliding up her sides,
- over her breasts, across her shoulders, down her arms. As he lay atop her,
- kissing her deeply, he massaged her fingers, her palms, her wrists...all
- eliciting moans of delight from the oddly enchanting Janice.
-
- He licked his way down her chest, and planted his face between her
- legs, at first teasing her, until finally he gave into her begging. He slowly
- ran his tongue through the center of her womanhood, making her scream with
- delight.
-
- "Oh, Chandler", she moaned.
-
- He stood up. "No, *not* Chandler. Ross. I'm *Ross*. Jesus, is there
- *anyone* who doesn't want Chandler?"
-
- He picked up his clothes and stormed out of the apartment.
-
- ***********************
-
- "You *sure* you never did that before?", Joey asked Chandler.
-
- "I swear to God, never in my life have I given a blowjob to a man.
- Never once. Had many dreams of being able to do it to myself, and why the
- *hell* did I just say that?"
-
- Joey smiled. "Ever dream of doing it to me?"
-
- "Not even while I was doing it. I'm sorry, Joey, but this bi thing
- just isn't for me. I won't let it stand in the way of our friendship, but
- I just can't do that again."
-
- Chandler walked out of the apartment in search of Monica.
-
- *********************
-
- Monica was dumbfounded. Not two minutes ago, she had just gotten off
- the phone with Rachel, who had announced that she and Phoebe were off to find
- a state that allowed lesbian marriages and would be back in the next couple
- of weeks, and now Chandler was sitting her telling her about the terrific
- blowjobs Joey gives.
-
- "I don't particularly want to think about it.", she said.
-
- "It was a spur of the moment thing. Like Valentine's day, when I
- slept with Janice. I didn't mean for it to happen - it just did. I'm not
- saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I was swept along by the tide of
- events."
-
- "But, but...not ten minutes before you were banging me, and then
- there you were sucking on Joey's cock. I'm telling you, it's not right."
-
- She walked over to the kitchen and started re-arranging her spatulas.
- "God, I feel like Rod Serling is going to hop out from behind the couch and
- announce that I'm in the Twighlight Zone."
-
- "I told him it won't happen again."
-
- Just then, Ross walked into the apartment, strolled over to the
- couch that Chandler was sitting on the back of, punched him in the face, and
- walked back out.
-
- Chandler picked himself back up off the floor, holding his chin.
- "What the fuck was that?", he asked, totally confused.
-
- Janice ran into the apartment. "Have you seen Ross? I *have* to
- find him. Oh, my God, I'm so sorry."
-
- "All I saw of him was his fist. Mind explaining?"
-
- Janice gave probably the most long winded explanation of what happened
- possible, almost causing Monica to fall asleep. Finally, recognition dawned
- on Chandler. He went to the bathroom, locked himself in, and lay down in
- the fetal position in the tub. Things most definately weren't going his way.
-
- **********************
-
-
- Will the Friends *stay* Friends? Is it the end for our heroes?
-
- Tune in when someone *other than me* writes the conclusion to this tale
- that I have so mercilessly fucked up.
-
- Mike
-
-
- --
- +-----------------------+-----------------------------------------------------+
- | Muttley, a.k.a | "The comfort of the knowledge of a rise into the |
- | Michael P. Simone | sky above could never parallel the challenge of an |
- | msimone@mcs.kent.edu | acquisition in the here and now. Here and now." |
- | (216) 686-0866 | -Letters to Cleo, "Here and Now" |
- +-----------------------+-----------------------------------------------------+
- Muttley the Wonder Dog's House of Delights!
- http://nimitz.mcs.kent.edu/~msimone
-