NetNews Usenet Archive 1993 #3/NN_1993_3.iso/spool/talk/bizarre/46235

Internet Message Format | 1993-01-24 | 1.8 KB

Path: sparky!uunet!pipex!warwick!uknet!comlab.ox.ac.uk!prg.oxford.ac.uk
From: [e-mail] (Hilda Tablet)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: I have been ripping out seams somebody else made tonight
Message-ID: <[e-mail]>
Date: 24 Jan 93 03:45:03 GMT
Organization: Doolittle and Dalley, Consulting Procrastinators
Lines: 23
Comment: ten
X-Mailer: mail-news 2.0.3

The six penthouses in this college are deemed to be `married accommodation'.
None of them quite, er, how shall I say it, conforms to this excruciatingly
simplified model of academic society;  nor, for the pedants, is any of the
penthouses itself married.  However, one of the very few advantages of the
married digs is that (whilst the college cleaning staff never intrude on our,
um, privacy) the college delivers one plain black bin-liner (empty) once a
week through the letter box.

This poor household cannot cope.  We have barely used half the plain black bin-
bags that the mystery of collegiate generosity has vouchsafed during this, the
very spring of our tenure.  Two options seem to present themselves:  either we
can find something other than rubbish to dispose of in the otherwise surplus
bags; or we can find something other than the disposal of rubbish with which
to use up the bags.  They are unfortunately small, indeed too small to be used
as high-fashion waterproof clothing; except perhaps for adventurous under-twos.
Helen was for throwing away bagfulls of unused bags, but that seemed too easy.
We do not have access in the short term to adequate supplies of under-twos.

Perhaps the other advantage of the married accommodation is that there are no
smoke detectors outside penthouse kitchens, so the false alarms at two o'clock
in the morning are not the fault of /our/ coffee roasting activities.
___
That is what we call them anyway.