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- Newsgroups: soc.bi
- Path: sparky!uunet!charon.amdahl.com!pacbell.com!ames!agate!iat.holonet.net!tcsi.com!hermes!miket
- From: miket@hermes.tcs.com (Michael Turner nmscore Assoc.)
- Subject: Re: Bisexuality and androgyny
- Message-ID: <1993Jan26.192410.29284@tcsi.com>
- Sender: news@tcsi.com
- Organization: Teknekron Communications Inc.
- References: <1993Jan18.060904.17015@udel.edu> <16B5A11EC5.SILVERI@QUCDN.QueensU.CA> <1k2a10INNq9o@network.ucsd.edu>
- Date: Tue, 26 Jan 1993 19:24:10 GMT
- Lines: 45
-
- In article <1k2a10INNq9o@network.ucsd.edu> vanhoek@bend.ucsd.edu (Karen van Hoek) writes:
- >I recently read the book _Closer to Home_; many of the essays talk about
- >how the bisexual movement is going to do away with gender and lead us
- >to a truly androgynous society. It got me wondering -- _are_ we all
- >into androgyny, and if so, to what extent? Certainly I'm a feminist
- >and in favor of doing away with all societally-restricted roles and
- >codes of behavior based on gender -- but I'm not sure I'd say I'm really
- >for "androgyny". And the idea that being bisexual means you don't
- >notice or care about gender -- not true for me. I like men who look
- >masculine, with as many of the secondary sex characteristics as possible
- >(deep voice, body hair, muscles, etc.), and I like women who look and
- >dress feminine (I tend to wear skirts and makeup a fair bit, myself).
- >I wonder if I'm unusual, and if everyone else in the bi movement likes
- >the androgynous look for both sexes. Any comments?
- >
- >Karen
-
- I like people to be comfortable. Nothing turns me off more than someone's
- constant insecurity about his/her appearance, whether the issue is social
- acceptance or danger of physical attack. That's a lot of what I don't
- like about homophobia -- it's not just what homophobia does to queerfolk,
- it's also what it does to almost everyone else, too!
-
- I know I don't like things the way they are. I also know I would hate it
- as much (maybe more) if most people were insecure about whether they were
- androgynous enough to pass for "normal" in a society where androgyny was
- the norm.
-
- I was at an Ani DeFranco performance Sunday night, and, clueless me, was
- surprised to see that her fandom seems, in the majority, to be Lesbian.
- (I try not to make assumptions about people's sexuality, but many people
- want you to, so why not?) Many of the women there were some of the cutest
- "boys" I've seen in awhile, but in sorting out the components of my
- attraction to them, it was hard for me to tell whether what I was attracted
- to was an aura of confidence, how much of that aura was implicitly
- signalled by dress and demeanor, how much of it was an "really" an
- attraction to men, blah, blah, etc. All rather boring, actually.
-
- So what am I trying to say, here? Just that I don't see bisexuality
- and/or androgyny as some kind of eschatological ideal. That old fallacy
- lurking behind some of those essays in _Closer to Home_ might be
- "everything would be OK if everyone was more like me." Hah, yeah, right.
- ---
- Michael Turner
- miket@tcs.com
-