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- Path: sparky!uunet!caen!malgudi.oar.net!news.ysu.edu!cmuvm.csv.cmich.edu!342dzjy
- Organization: Central Michigan University
- Date: Friday, 22 Jan 1993 08:32:33 EST
- From: susan miles <342DZJY@CMUVM.CSV.CMICH.EDU>
- Message-ID: <93022.083234342DZJY@CMUVM.CSV.CMICH.EDU>
- Newsgroups: alt.parents-teens
- Subject: Re: My daughter needs to be more assertive
- Distribution: world
- References: <1993Jan18.090651.628@news.wesleyan.edu>
- Lines: 24
-
- It is so hard for us to remember that so many of our own struggles for
- independence have made us who we are. At the same time, knowing what we do
- now, it is so difficult to let go and let our children make their own way.
- As the parent of eight daughters (now ages 15-22) I am slowly (very slowly)
- beginning to realize and understand that what is so important to me is not
- necessarily important to them.
-
- I am needing to make hard decisions between what I am able to approve and what
- I am able to accept. Working on that distinction is helping some relationships
- with some of my daughters. An organzation that has helped me keep working to
- be the kind of parent I want to be is the Cline-Fay Institute in Golden, CO.
- Their books and tapes have provided me with some guidance as well as solace.
- Most recently, their book 'Parenting Teens With Love and Logic" (by Foster
- Cline and Jim Fay) has been a godsend. A toll-free number to request a current
- catalog is 1-800-338-4065. I wish I had been aware of 'love and logic'
- parenting ten years ago.
-
- Letting go is hard, but it seems the only way to keep the parts of a relation-
- ship that are important. Good luck!
-
- Susan Miles
- Reference Librarian
- Central Michigan University
- Mt. Pleasant, MI 48859
-