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- Path: sparky!uunet!spool.mu.edu!agate!darkstar.UCSC.EDU!ucscb.UCSC.EDU!billk
- From: billk@ucscb.UCSC.EDU (Bill Karwin)
- Newsgroups: alt.personals
- Subject: Re: Need Dating Advice
- Date: 22 Nov 1992 03:31:03 GMT
- Organization: University of California, Santa Cruz
- Lines: 56
- Distribution: midwest
- Message-ID: <1emutnINNff3@darkstar.UCSC.EDU>
- References: <Bxtr5w.M8q@mentor.cc.purdue.edu> <Bxv2vo.8JM@world.std.com> <Bxv31F.8r4@world.std.com>
- NNTP-Posting-Host: ucscb.ucsc.edu
-
-
- Andrew Page had some good advice! I agree with him.
- Here's some comments of my own which I hope will be
- as useful.
-
- If she is joining a sorority, perhaps she is looking forward
- to an active social life, and doesn't want to get committed
- to one person (you), thereby hindering her opportunities
- for partying and meeting people. If you have indicated your
- interest in commitment (however subtlely -- women are very
- intelligent and pick up on these things :) she may be wary
- about getting involved with you. Of course, this is all
- speculation.
-
- When she said she was tired, it is possible that she was
- covering up for her unenthusiastic reaction to you.
- I don't mean to be mean by suggesting this, but if you are
- not as attractive or charming in person as she was hoping,
- she may have been uncommunicative (because she was thinking
- about how best to let you know she didn't want to see you
- again), and then explained it by making up a reason why she
- is "tired".
-
- When a woman says she is "really busy", and doesn't propose
- a time in the future when she will be available, it usually
- means that she doesn't want to see you.
-
- The fact that she ran away when she saw you come into the
- library sure makes it seem like she doesn't want to talk to you.
- You told her to call if she wants to talk. If she does, she will.
- If she loses your phone number, you should wonder about whether
- she is really all that interested or if she is just too flaky.
-
- [disclaimer: I don't mean to make it sound like women do these
- things and men don't. But since we're talking about women,
- I refer to them specifically.]
-
- Some tips: relax. Don't expect every date to turn out to be
- "That Special Someone". Use dates as learning experiences.
- Go out on lots of dates. Get to know lots of women and practice
- holding conversations (preferably on topics you would consider
- appropriate on dates; I've known guys who can talk to their
- female friends, but it's always about how they can't get a date,
- which is not a good topic for a first date). Pay attention to
- your personal appearance. Tuck in your shirt (all of it).
- Button your pants. Comb your hair. Consider deoderant.
- Shave regularly, or else take care of your facial hair.
- Stand up straight. Don't stare at her breasts. Look at her eyes.
- Don't tense up. Think about what kind of "look" you are attracted
- to, and dress to match. These sorts of things are simple
- affectations, but they DO count. Why put yourself at a disadvantage?
- Decide how you want to appear to the woman, and put some effort
- into it.
-
- I don't mean to talk down to you, I'm just listing some of the things
- I have had to learn after my "upbringing in a cultural vacuum". :-)
-