NetNews Usenet Archive 1992 #27/NN_1992_27.iso/spool/alt/irc/4268

Internet Message Format | 1992-11-19 | 5.3 KB

Path: sparky!uunet!munnari.oz.au!manuel.anu.edu.au!coombs!mark
From: [e-mail] (Mark)
Newsgroups: alt.irc
Subject: Avalog arrested....
Date: 20 Nov 92 03:13:02 GMT
Organization: Australian National University
Lines: 161
Message-ID: <mark.722229182@coombs>
NNTP-Posting-Host: 150.203.76.2
Organisation: Wassat?!


I wrote:
%Someone cancelled it on coombs... (strangely enuff it's where you know
%who sits most of the time) Subtle? Nah.

Turns out Avalon did it from his darrenr@vitruvius account at Melbourne Uni.
Why I'm not sure... he seems to think he has the right to impeach on the
free speech of others and control the USENET "system" :) as he wishes.....
Wake up and smell the cornflakes loser.

In case anyone else missed it Ive reposted it here. And in case he tries it
again I'll state that this article is to me, complete and correct, (least the
bits I wrote) and I do not wish it to be cancelled. K? I explicitly forbid
anal-log (aka Darren Reed, aka Avalon, aka FuckHead aka ShitForBrains aka
Avalog) from cancelling it.

Onwards... (You can tell I'm enjoying this cant you :)

]From: [e-mail] (SNUB HQ)
]Newsgroups: alt.irc
]Subject: Avalon arrested! (Repost)
]Organization: Centre for Biomedical Engineering, University of NSW
]
]The following piece of satire was cancelled illegitimately shortly
]after being posted. I guess somebody out there doesn't have a sense
]of humour. Complaints have been sent to the appropriate people at
]ANU.
]
]            NEWS FLASH
]
]Avalog has been apprehended not far from NORAD after launching
]nuclear weapons at every major city in the world.
]
]His interview with the arresting officers is included below.
]
]Arresting Officer: Did you launch nuclear missiles at all major
]        cities in the world?
]
]Avalog: No, I didn't.
]
]AO:    Are you sure about that?
]
]Avalog: Absolutely.
]
]AO:    We have 20 witnesses who say they saw you do it.
]
]Avalog: They're lying. I don't have the disk space.
]
]AO:    You were seen in the launch room.
]
]Avalog: That doesn't mean I launched them.
]
]AO:    There is a video tape made by the closed circuit Television in
]    that room showing you launching the missiles.
]
]Avalog: Can I see it?
]
][Video screens. Avalog remains silent for five minutes]
]
]AO:    Well?
]
]Avalog: Well what?
]
]AO:    Well do you admit you launched the missiles?
]
]Avalog: No, I pressed this button. *It* launched the missiles.
]
]AO:    So you did want to bomb the world.
]
]Avalog:    Get a clue you lamer arresting officer. If you did as much
]    coding on the missiles as I do you would *know* that I
]    didn't expect them to go off when I pressed the button.
]
]AO:    Why did you do it?
]
]Avalog: I had to launch the missiles to catch the hackers.
]
]AO:    What hackers?
]
]Avalog: The hackers who were hacking into my machine. And
]    by the way, I think you have your prioritiies and
]    loyalties all screwed around. Why are you arresting
]    me and not them? And why didn't you tell me about
]    the people hacking into my machine.
]
]AO:    I didn't know about the hackers hacking into your machine.
]
]Avalog: And besides, it's not like launching missiles is
]    exactly hard. Any of the generals in NORAD could have
]    done it at any time.
]
]AO:    But they never have done it.
]
]Avalog: How do I know that. Why should we trust them to have
]    missiles when we don't know if they launch them all
]    the time or not?
]
]AO:    Why did you need to launch missiles to catch hackers?
]
]Avalog: Because they were hiding and it was the only way I
]    could find out who they were and where they were.
]
]AO:    How?
]
]Avalog:    Well I knew that if the hacking stopped, it had to have
]    been somebody in one of the cities I blew up.
]
]AO:    You also killed millions of innocent people, who never
]    had anything to do with hacking into your machine and
]    probably never even realised it was possible to launch
]    nuclear missiles.
]
]Avalog:    Believe me, it's not something I enjoyed doing, but I
]    had no choice. I had to do it to catch the hackers.
]
]AO:    Well I don't think you should let you get away with this.
]    What do you suggest we do?
]
]Avalog:    Let me go. I only did what I had to do.
]
]AO:    So you're saying that if you get somebody hacking in again,
]    you'd do it again? You'd launch nuclear missiles and blow
]    up people all around the world?
]
]Avalog: Yes, I'd do it again. I didn't have any choice.
]
]AO:    Well isn't that just all the more reason for us not to trust
]    you?
]
]Avalog:    Well Uncle Sam has launched missiles in the past.
]
]AO:    True. But right now we're dealing with *you* launching missiles.
]
]Avalog:    Anyway, what are you going to do about all the vanity ops?
]
]AO:    What vanity ops?
]
]Avalog:    All the vanity ops on strummer who IRC from NORAD.
]
]AO:    Stick to the thread and read what I wrote, and you'll do fine.
]
]Avalog:    Well the people in NORAD can launch nuclear missiles at any
]    time too. If you can trust them you should be able to trust
]    me.
]
]AO:    They could launch nuclear missiles, but they didn't. You *did*.
]
]Avalog:    How do you know they haven't launched nuclear missiles?
]    .
]    .
]    .
]
]
]When asked about this situation, Waftam told reporters "Avalog is not
]an inherently evil person. There is more evil in the Arresting Officer
]than there is in Avalog. Avalog should be allowed to have his own
]nuclear weapons whenever he wants to".

]Copyright 1992 #FOFH. All rights reserved.
]Mail all flames to [e-mail]