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- stay in line. stay in step. people are afraid of someone who is not
- in step with them. it makes them look foolish t' themselves for being
- in step. it might even cross their mind that they themselves are in
- the wrong step. do not run nor cross the red line. if you go too far
- out in any direction, they will lose sight of you. they'll feel
- threatened. thinking that they are not a part of something they saw
- go past them, they'll feel something's going on up there that they
- don't know of. revenge will set in. they will start thinking of how
- t' get rid of you. act mannerly towards them. if you don't, they will
- take it personal. as you come directly in contact face t' face, do not
- make it a secret of how much you need them. if they sense that you have
- no need for them, the first thing they will do is try t' make you need
- them. if this doesn't work, they will tell you of how much they don't
- need you. if you do not show any sadness at a remark such as this, they
- will immediately tell other people of how much they don't need you.
- your name will begin to come up in circles where people gather to tell
- about all the people they don't need. you will begin t' get famous this
- way. this, though, will only get the people who you don't need in the
- first place all the more madder. you will become a whole topic of
- conversation. needless t' say, these people who don't need you will
- start hating themselves for needing t' talk about you. then you yourself
- will start hating yourself for causing so much hate. as you can see, it
- will all end in one great gunburst.
-
- never trust a cop in a raincoat. when asked t' define yourself exactly,
- say you are an exact mathematician. do not say or do anything that he
- who standing in front of you watching cannot understand, he will feel
- you know something he doesn't. he will take it as a serious blow. he will
- react with blinding speed and write your name down. talk on his terms.
- if his terms are old-fashioned an' you've passed that stage all the more
- easier t' get back there. say what he can understand clearly. say it simple
- t' keep your tongue out of your cheek. after he hears you, he can label you
- good or bad. anyone will do. t' some people, there is only good an' bad.
- in any case, it will make him feel somewhat important. it is better to stay
- away from these people.
-
- be careful of enthusiasm...it is all temporary and don't let it sway you.
- when asked if you go t' church, always answer yes, never look at your shoes.
- when asked what you think of gene autry singing of hard rains gonna fall
- say that nobody can sing it as good as peter, paul and mary. at the mention
- of the president's name, eat a pint of yogurt an' go t' sleep early...
- when asked if you're a communist, sing america the beautiful in an italian
- accent, beat up nearest street cleaner.
-
- if by any chance you're caught naked in a parked car, quick turn the radio
- on full blast an' pretend you're driving. never leave the house without a
- jar of peanut butter. do not wear matched socks. when asked to do 100
- pushups always smoke a pound of deodorant beforehand. when asked if you're
- a capitalist, rip open your shirt, sing buddy can you spare a dime with
- your right foot forward an' proceed t' chew up a dollar bill. do not sign
- any dotted line. do not fall in trap of criticizing people who do nothing
- else but criticize.
-
- do Not create anything, it will be misinterpreted. it will not change.
- it will follow you the rest of your life. when asked what you do for a
- living, say you laugh for a living. be suspicious of people who say that
- if you are not nice t' them, they will commit suicide. when asked if you
- care about the world's problems, look deeply into the eyes of he that asks
- you, he will not ask you again. when asked if you've spent time in jail,
- announce proudly that some of your best friends've asked you that. beware
- of bathroom walls that've not been written on.
-
- when told t' look at yourself...never look. when asked t' give your real
- name...never give it.
-