In a major coup, we are proud to have tracked down the one and only Godfrey Tidmarsh. This seventy-something former football pundit, traveller, Telegraph contributor and waspish social commentator has agreed - with reservations - to be our new astrologer. In a crazy, amoral world, where decency shows her drawers for a bag of toffees, the esteemed Mr T will bring gravity, perception and plain-speaking to his monthly celestial summaries.