Emoticons
You wouldn't need to have access to e-mail for very long before you started seeing this little critter -- :) -- Who is he? Where did he come from? What does he want from us? If you haven't seen him yet, then perhaps you've encountered his evil twin brother -- :( -- Whether delightful or annoying, emoticons are here to stay. When your meaning could be lost or misconstrued, insert a sideways smiley (or fractured frown, when applicable). And don't feel you're limited just to the colon and parenthesis characters. Let loose on the keyboard and get creative! There are about forty billion variations (and more are sure to come). For a message to a friend or family member, an emoticon is perfectly acceptable. I would suggest not going overboard, though. Sending business letters electronically? Dispose of them altogether. Man, I wish these things were around when I was younger. Beware the emoticon, my son... for they may induce great joy, but they can also make you look like a fool in the eyes of future employers. Just a friendly word of advice. You have been warned, gnomehopper.
Encryption
Somehow, you've managed to infiltrate the enemy base. Now you have to contact headquarters and tell them where the plans are hidden. But how? You can't just get on your walkie talkie and tell them. No, you're going to have to be sneakier than that. So what's a secret agent to do? You send an encrypted message that your colleagues back at headquarters can decrypt. Once you've finished encrypting and decrypting, you can all watch Tales From The Crypt -- which is quite cryptic itself at times. These days, encryption is the method in which data is rearranged so that it cannot be read (on the surface). Without a key, or electronic "answer book," it cannot be decrypted. A practical example of encryption is when you make an purchase online and have to enter your credit card number. For security purposes, your number is encrypted to avoid theft, fraud, or any other number of nasty things. That's infinitely safer than the telephone, I tell ya! Some have brought up the argument that if encryption becomes too difficult to decipher, it might open a window for terrorists. I hope they weren't talking about me... I just wanted to steal the President's famous meatloaf recipe.
Energy Star
Energy Star shouldn't be confused with Star Search (another well-respected star). Although Mr. Bigglesworth did win the spokes model competition three years in a row ("Yeah, baby! Shake those peripherals!"). The Energy Star label means your system is able to conserve power, depending (of course) on the settings you've chosen. For example, you can have the monitor shut off automatically after a set amount of time, or have your system go into standby mode after so many minutes of inactivity. How do you know if your PC is Energy Star compliant? Just right click anywhere on the desktop, select Properties, then select the Screen Saver tab. You should see the little Energy Star logo. Is it not there? Look around the outside of your monitor (you may need to get up from your chair for this). See any stickers? Okay, what about on the back of your monitor (where the power cord plugs in)? Well, then... I guess you'll just have to shut her down manually every time she's not in use. Remember, the less power a computer uses, the more energy is saved. But you already knew that, right? Ed McMahon has been in standby mode for years.
Executable
This program will be executed at dawn. Ya know, unless the governor calls. Okay, you've all seen files with the .EXE extension, right? That file is an executable. This means that the file runs automatically when you click on it (and to run a program is known as "executing" the program). Pretty cool, huh? Keep in mind that an executable doesn't have to end with EXE. Files ending in .BAT or .COM are executables as well. Because executables open automatically, it's a good idea to be wary of ones that arrive as an e-mail attachment, as they may contain a virus. Oh yeah, executables are sometimes referred to as "binaries," though this doesn't really apply to .BAT (batch) files because they consist of plain text commands instead of compiled code.
Extranet
All these cursed Nets! I'm telling ya, it's enough to tie your mind in knots. Well, I'm here to untangle your brain knot as much as I can. We've touched on intranets and local area networks (LANs), so get ready for another one: extranet. Oh, that's just great. Don't fret -- this one is easy: it's just an intranet that isn't internal. There's a little bit more involved -- extra stuff, so to speak. For example, if you sell cotton candy and want the Milwaukee Cotton Candy Supply Company to have access to your company's intranet, you can set up a private network or virtual private network (VPN) as a means of access. Of course, this makes the need for security all that stronger. Solid hardware firewalls and strong user authentication protocols should keep everybody in check. Now you know what an extranet is... and why it's important to the cotton candy empire.
