Useless Pages
and friends:
Useless Site of the Week:
Strips
Published in Viz
I don't understand this at all. He goes through all the trouble of
listing everything in a publication that regularly prints comics
like "Buster Gonads and his Unfeasibly Large Testicles" or "Jonny
Fartpants", and then he edits it "in interest of good taste."
Useless Home Page of the Week:
Jon's Home Page
I was recently flamed for putting the Soundex Code cgi script on the
Useless Pages. They were right - there is a lot of stuff on this page
a LOT more useless than THAT!
- ^Gaber^uoko
"Jabberwocky" translated into Esperanto - a concept so pointless,
this is the first Gopher page to make The Useless Pages!
- The
1994 Baseball Season Simulation
They're wrong. I think the Cubs would have won the world series.
- All Things Blue
Which pretty much somes up how I felt after looking at this page.
- Bas
van Fraassen's Published Works
I can hardly wait for the list of his UNPUBLISHED works!
- The
Beckman Institute Second Floor Toilet
You can never be too rich or have too much toilet humor.
- Blinking Binary
Ooooh, this page is painful!
- Bonus!
Bonus!
- Byron's Home Page
This is what happens if you read "Wired" too much.
- Car Talk
Staff
I used to date their Head of Computer Services, Dot Matrix
- The Caverns
of Carnac
You're in a twisty little maze of web pages, all alike.
- Chew Magazine
Yeah, I know, it's useless on purpose - the domain name is a dead
giveaway.
- The Chomskybot
To Noam is to Lovem.
- Computer Animation Society
This page's graphics aren't quite as impressive as those in "Toy
Story"
- Computer Workplace
Oooh, now HERE are people I would trust to do computer work for
ME!
- Connecticut
Technical Community College
I know it's not fair to pick on pages that are admittedly
"under construction", but in this case, I"ll make an exception.
- Custom Persian
Rugs
I want a rug that looks like Conway's Game of Life!
- Data On the
Town
Trekkies scare me, but some more than others.
- Dick the
Computer Consultant
What is it about this page that makes me not want to hire him?
Is it the fact he considers a page like this "World Wide Web Publishing"?
Or that if he's so experienced in Excel, why can't he spell it? No,
it's that I would NOT trust a so-called consultant who uses AOL.
- Domestic
Duties I'm Neglecting
I'm glad I'm not the only one with these problems.
- Eric's State of
Depression
I wonder how being listed on this page will affect it.
- Find the
Pope in the Porsche
- Flammability
of Household Products
What the hell! Go ahead, kids, TRY it at home!
- Giant Hatpin Collection
Is it a very large collection of hatpins, or a collection of hatpins
that are very large? I don't know!
- The Great Wallpaper
Debate
What about (shudder) paneling?
- Guess the
Pixel
It's worth playing to the end just for the nude picture of
Bea Arthur you get when you win.
- The Home Page of the
Web
Gee, and I always thought it was at
CERN.
- How to
Use the World Wide Web
Let's see...I click on the Netscape icon then click on this
link to teach me how to click on the Netscape icon and click
on a link...
- The Idiot Confessional
Do AOL users get a bulk discount?
- Inspired Words
William S. Burroughs, eat your heart out!
- Jeff's
Flat Tire Page
- Jeff's T-Shirt
Collection
EVERYBODY should have a page like THIS!
- Maya's Home Page
She's been featured here so many times that I figured I would
save myself the time and just link to her home page rather than
the dozens of more times she'll be here in the future.
- Mind Reader
Is this what they mean by "fuzzy logic"?
- Name Jon's
Computer
- Name
the New Barbies
Personally, I'm waiting for the Andrea Dworkin Barbie.
- The Nicole Simpson/Ron
Goldman Reward Fund
Obvious OJ jokes aside, this page states that there is a huge reward
to find the killer of Nicole Simpson. It also states you can send a
contrabution to the person running this page. However, it does NOT
say there is ANY correlation between these two statements!
- Ostrich/Emu Infonet
Proving, once again, the Web is for the birds.
- The Pentomino Page
WHOOP! WHOOP! WHOOP! Geek Alert! Geek Alert!
- Pee Wee's
Playhouse
I know you are, but what am I?
- The Physics
Page
But tell us how you REALLY feel...
- Pong
Kombat
Yes, it's exactly what you think it is.
- Random Internet
Access Provider
Uh...but you need to have access to the Internet to see any of
these pages...Oh, God, I'm so confused...
- Reasons to
Love Microsoft
The sad part is he's serious!
- Rodney Dangerfield's Home Page
I really have no respect for this page.
- Sea Monkeys
Sea Monkeys are NOT primates! (That's a Sam and Max quote)
- Social
Security Number Origin Finder
Mine is from Mars!
- The Soundex Code
Wow! I never knew there were any nerds at MIT!
- Stuff Alf the Poet
is Looking For
Hey, I still haven't found what I'm looking for! (That's a
Negativland reference)
- Stupid
Questions to Ask Pilots
Is nice to know computer consultants don't have a monopoly...
- The Squid
Dress-up Contest
The REAL challenge is to dress up a squid so it DOESN'T look
like Senator Exon.
- Three
Part Names
Everybody email them and tell them they left off "Charles Nelson
Reilly" until they get him on this list!
- Urban Decay
Cyberpunk makeup tips!
- Useless
Information
Is there any other type?
- A
Useless Page
Ah, I see "The Spot" has a new URL.
- What's in
Jeremy's Wallet
I can hardly wait to see what he does with his glove compartment.
- Where's
the Nearest Wal-Mart?
Sometimes it's SO hard not just leaving
a comment of "Who CARES?"
- The Winkie
Gallery
Mommy, they scare me...
- Xkeycount
Top List
Place your bets!
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Home for Retired Useless Pages - over 450 links to the utterly useless!
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pages!
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Last modified: 01/14/96/EM>
useless@primus.com